Underneath my yellow skin

Why Elden Ring is not a 10 for me, part two

I want to start this post by saying that I don’t believe in 10s. Here is yesterday’s post. I don’t think anything is perfect, and while I get in theory that there is a perfect score, well, I mentally call it “a really damn good game” or something like that. I also get that you have to have a top score. If there wasn’t a 10, but only a 9, then the 9 would become the perfect score. It’s just a thing to me that I don’t like a perfect score or talking about numbers as if they are objective (when it comes to ranking).

It makes it kinda pointless, then, for me to talk about why I don’t think of Elden Ring as a 10, then, right? Maybe, but I’m going to do it, anyway. And it’s not just the number 10, but the fact that people think it’s the perfect game–or close to it. It’s not. I hasten to add that it’s my favorite game for good reason, so I’m not dissing it by saying it’s not perfect. Then again, I get freaked out by the whole talk about perfect because by definition, nothing is perfect. Nothing can hope to be perfect! So I guess I should just make my peace with it by thinking of it as ‘a really fucking good game that is a cut above the rest’.

My brain doesn’t work that way, though. A 10 is perfect and it means that nothing can be better. Or if things can be improved, it should just be little things. The fact that the port sucked on release knocked it automatically out of 10 territory for me (though, ironically, I didn’t have much trouble with it on my mid-tier PC). I ended up giving it a 9.65 or so–which is equal or just above/below what I would give Dark Souls III.  I think? That may not be what I gave it, but it’s what I would give it now after playing the DLC.

We won’t talk about the last boss of the DLC because I have way too many felings about that boss to cover it in this–well, no. I will touch on it because it’s emblematic of what I found problematic about Elden Ring–and the rest of FromSoft’s games.

I want to be very clear that I am a huge FromSoft fan. I admire their unrelenting vision and the way that they do what they want, no matter what. They have changed the landscape of gaming, and it’s overwhelmingly for the better. They are the standard against which others can measure themselves, and inevitably come up short. They are almost gods in the industry–deservedly so.


That said, they are not perfect. There are ways in which their games fall short, both big and small. I mentioned earlier that the final boss of the DLC is emblematic of the issues I have with their games.

Obviously, there will be massive spoilers ahead.

For some time, I have felt that From has been moving in the direction of focusing too much on making the bosses hard. They weren’t incredibly hard in the main game of Elden Ring except for a few, but in general, the bosses have been scaling up in difficulty ever since the first Dark Souls.

It’s not completely their fault. Their hardcore fans are so obsesed with how HARD the bosses are to the exclusion of everything else. In fact, there are plenty of fans who have no idea what the lore is for each game. Granted, FromSoft doesn’t maake it easy to find that lore, but it’s there. Some of it through item description. Some of it through talking to NPCs. Some of it through bosses, areas, and enemies. Some of it through talking with the community.

That’s part of what I love about the games in addition to the exploring. The environments are incredible and their level design is some of the best ever. I can get lost for hours just wandering around, especially in Elden Ring. Even in NG+, I want to do everything. Well, not everything. There are some things that I ignore–like the golems. And the fire-spewing heads. And the dragons. I mean, I do them, but I don’t enjoy them at all. And in Elden Ring, there are so many of them. Named ones, but also ones that just mill about. Here’s my issue with the dragons. Even the named ones have the same basic movesets. The only thing that really changes is the status that they inflict.

I have gotten to the point where I don’t even acknowledge that they exist. There is one in the DLC that is a must-fight just for all the pomp and circumstance, but other than that, I just sigh in frustration. I do appreciate that there are the Ancient Dragons, I guess? (They are the super important ones that are actually dragons rather than wyverns.) But that doesn’t mean I like to fight them any more than I do the other dragons.

I think the problem is that there is only so much you can do with a hulking flying mass. Unless they want to make one that disappears and reappears–oh wait. They did that, and I was not pleased by that addition. I have a hard time tracking bosses without them disappearing on me; I do not appreciate it when  I can’t find them. Add to that the problem I have with my reflexes, and it’s a nonstarter for me.

One thing that annoys the fuck out of me, and I know this will always annoy the fuck out of me is the last pixel. What I mean is when you hit an enemy or a boss and they have one last pixel. It’s especially irritating when it comes to hitting an enemy with magic (like a Lightning Spear) because you only have so much blue juice. And you know it’s deliberate when it’s just one fucking sliver. It doesn’t matter how overpowered I am. If an enemy ends up with a sliver of health, then I just get mad and frustrated. Yes, I know that it’s dependent upon several different things, but it happens way too often.

More tomorrow.

Leave a reply