Underneath my yellow skin

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Truly the end of Elden Ring

Ok. I’ve dallied long enough. I need to talk about the last boss of the game, so, of course, *SPOILERS* ahead. In the last post, I talked about the penultimate boss, but I didn’t really remember him because I melted him quickly. I hate the trope that magic is OP. Newsflash! Any stat you put 70 points into is OP. In fact, the most OP I’ve ever been is the first time I did a Zweihander run in Dark Souls. Now, I am OP in NG++ , but that’s without focusing on one stat. Yes, I have 70 in Intelligence, but I Wolf’s Assault more often than not. THAT is OP! And I only have 26 or whatever in Strength.

By the way, I have died four times in NG++. I have finished the main bosses of Limgrave, the first area. I have yet to die to an enemy–all four deaths are fall deaths. Twice because I tried to jump somewhere I couldn’t (but absolutely should have been able to) and two Torrent-related deaths. This reinforces my belief that games that are not platformers should not include platforming. One of those deaths was on the horizontal tombstones that you can jump down on, of course.

Let’s talk about the final boss. It is a very divisive boss. Some people love it and some people hate it, but very rarely are people indifferent to it. First, I’ll tell you what the boss is. It’s Radagon, the consort to Queen Marika. But wait! That’s not all he is. He’s actually part of Marika. I mean, they are the same person/demi-god. You find this out with an incantation in Leyndell Royal Capital in front of a Marika statue that changes into a Radagon statue once you do the gesture (with the incantation) in front of the statue.

It’s supposed to be a big reveal, but it didn’t astonish me at all because it made perfect sense. No idea why, but I did. Of  course he was Marika. Why the hell not? Never mind that they had children–twins. A son and a daughter–Miquella and Malenia. Don’t think about it too hard because then yu’ll have to make sense of it. It’s not meant to fit into our world.


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Elden Ring end but not ending

In yesterday’s post, I went off on a tangent about NG++. Why? Because that’s the way my brain works. I don’t stay on any one paith for much longer than necessary. In my youth, I loved a footnote and/or a side note. I used to find it amusing to have as many footnotes in a post as possible. Once in a while, I would even have a footnote to a footnote.

Anyway, I’m cruising through NG++ like it was no big thing. I have died once, and that was to a fall on Torrent. He is the best boi, for sure, but goddamn doing platforming on him is impossible. It’s so imprecise and there is no coming back if you’re about to go off a cliff. Do I count that? No, I do not.

I did *SPOILERS* Margit easily. Me and Mini-Me. Then it was onto Godrick the Grafted. I have never done them solo because…I don’t actually know why. Well, I do. I love Nepheli Loux. I love her a lot. So I want her by my side. Anyway, I decided to do it with just Mini-Me, and it was a blood bath–for him. I melted him and moved on. I had done a bunch before meeting him, something that took me probably fifteen to twenty hours in my first playthrough. I think it took me roughly an three or four hours this time. Maybe five. About a fourth of the time it took me the first time. Which is understandable because I’ve done this bit six times now.

I’m not trying to zip through at high speed, but I’m not trying to dally, either. My goal is to just see how easy I find it and it’s been no sweat so far. That doesn’t mean it won’t be at some point. I’m mostly not summoning, but I’m not holding myself to that, either. It’s been chill so far, and I don’t anticipate it being much harder for at least the next area.

So. The final area of the game. Leyndell, Ashen Capital. I do understand that it’s thematically correct to have the capital as two areas in the game. One pre-Erdtree-burning and one afterwards. But there’s still a hollow feeling in my breast that it’s the final area. Especially as there is nothing else in it except the final bosses. Well, you can access the Slumbering Shunning-Grounds through a hole in the ground, but that’s it. After Gideon, then you have to fight Godfrey/Hoarah loux. They are two separate bosses, though they share the same health bar. Godfrey is much like his golden shade whom you fought earlier when you first got into this area–the first time around. He wasn’t a big deal then, but I expected him to be a big deal now. He was the second-to-the-last boss! I expected him to be HARD.


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Last area of Elden Ring

Ok. I have dilly-dallied long enough. Let’s tackle the last area of Elden Ring. In the last post, I rambled about a lot of stuff, including the different endings, the plat, and whatever else is on my mind. So let’s talk about the final section, which is *SPOILERS* a reskin of an earlier area. One you were at just previously. The one I jokingly say is the end game area–and it actually turned out to be true. Leyndell Royal Capital, the place I was firmly convinced was the last area. Except, now it’s Leyndell, Ashen Capital. Everything is in ashes because you set the Erdtree on fire. Or something. I am not 100% clear about that, but that’s close to what happened.

Anyway, you’re transported to Leyndell, Ashen Capital once you kill Maliketh. You are outside in the sandy dunes and have to make your way up to the throne area. Or you can go through the hole to the Subterranean Shunning-Grounds if you want. But you cannot go back to Leyndell Royal Capital.

That irritated me in my first playthrough because there was an easily missable item that I could not get once I burned it all down. It’s a faith-based weapon behind a closed door that I did not know could be opened. I can get it on NG+, of course, but I’m saving this character for the DLC, which means she cannot go into NG+ for some time.

It’s an interesting thing to do. I’m ambivalent about it, honestly. I get why it happened from a story point of view, but it feels a bit….cheap. Like, we can’t be bothered to make a new area for the last area. Which, I know that sounds contrary to my earlier argument that there are too many areas in the game. It’s not, though. They could cut out Miquella’s Haligtree, cut Mountaintops of the Giants in half, and then create a whole new final area.

Hm. In thinking about it more, I do understand why they did it the way they did. For context, the first time you go to Leyndell Royal Capital, you fight the Golden Shade of Godfrey and then Morgott, the Omen King. Afterwards, you try to get to the throne, and there are thorns blocking your way. You find out that you have to do something to burn them down.

That’s when you go to the Mountaintops of the Giants…by the way. There are these field bosses that are only found at night. They are the Night’s Cavalry, and they are pretty imposing. They are a knight on a horse, all covered in black, and they come out at night, obviously. They are the nighttime version of the Tree Sentinels. In the Consecrated Snowfield in the Mountaintop of Giants, there is a calvacade that has two of them guarding the yeti-pulling caravan. The first time I fought them, it was such a hard time. Common advice is to pull one away from the caravan and fight them and then pull the other.

They are strong, and it tooke me forever to figure out a way to successfully cheese them. This time around, in NG+, I was going around cleaning things up before going into NG++. I decided to do them and resigned myself to several attempts. Instead, it took me twice and I only died on the first attempt because I did not heal at the right time. I still cheesed them, but much less so. Here’s the deal. All the enemies have a leash limit. They are tethered, some with a tighter leash than others. With these guys, you can pull them back to where the Site of Grace is and then they’ll slowly retreat back to the caravan. In the past, I just Swarm of Flies them until they died. That was tedious and hit-or-miss. That’s how I did all the Night’s Cavalry, to be honest.


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Elden Ring and the actual end?

Still talking about the second half of the game. Elden Ring, I mean. Honestly, if we were just talking about the first half of the game, I probably would give the game close to a 10, no notes–or at least very few notes. Yesterday, I was talking about *SPOILERS* the underground and how elaborate it is. It goes on and on and on, and it’s just jaw-dropping in is entirety. The underground itself, I have a few notes, but mostly for one part of it.

The second half of the game, though, I have several notes. Honestly, my biggest one would have been to cut out half of it. All the cut-and-paste bosses (who then became common enemies), the repettion and two of my least-favorite areas (Mountaintops of the Giants and Miquella’s Haligtree) are in the second half. Caelid is grim, but it is a top-notch area. In concept. I hate going there when I’m frail and weak, but it’s integral to the game.

I really feel like From wanted to pad out the game, and I have no idea why. If they had cut out those two areas, it still would have been a cracking game. In fact, I think it would have been better. It would have tightened up everytihng and made the experience better. I know that the Fire Giant was a pivotal boss, but he’s such a blah boss and his area is just annoying AF.

My PSA to devs: Not being able to see in a game is not fun. I always find it amusing when they want you to adjust the gamma until the image is just barely visible. I crank it as high as it can go unless it looks washed out. Most of the people on YouTube are like me. They laugh at the ‘make it barely visible’ notification and crank that gamma.

As someone with terrible vision and almost no periphery, I really don’t appreciate games that mess with my vision. I have enough trouble when the gamma is bright and there is nothing blocking my sight. Once you add all that shit, it menas I’m fighting my hidden disability along with the game.

PSA 2: A lot of people pooh-pooh the idea that games should make any concessions to people who do not have perfect vision and terrific reflexes. In Final Fantasy XVI (Squeenix), there are rings that make various things easier. People hated on them, which made no sense to me. No one was forced to wear them, so why not just let it be? But, no. They were outraged at the fact that this would even BE in the game.

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Elden Ring and the end(ish) of the game

In the last post, I was talking  about (again, *SPOILERS* for the whole second half of the game) the massive underground of Elden Ring, which is, as I just said, massive. In fact, one of the funniest things about the game is the reaction to the lift when you the player is going down for the first time. There are two lifts, and both are pretty inspiring. One is more gobsmacking than the other, though.

You run into this well (in front of one of them is a runebear, which is massive) and step on a lift. You go down…and down…and down even further. And you go down some more. If you look to the outside, it’s purple and ethereal on the way down. There is a starry sky, and it’s just fucking amazing. Like, you think  it’s going to be one little room or something at the bottom, and it’s a whole new city. And more. So much more. It is one of those moments that you don’t get often in a Triple A game.

Here’s the thing. You don’t have to go there at all. It’s easily missable–both the entrances to the initial areas. In one case, a big golem is shooting at you. In the other, a runebear is chasing you. So you’ll probably rush into the well and step on the lift, grateful to still be alive. And you’d be forgiven for not paying attention as it starts going down. And down. And, as I said, even further down.

And then your mind is going to be blown when you finally realize that you are in a whole ‘nother city under the areas you’ve already explored. And then later on, when you realize that many of these areas link up in some fashion. That is the part that blows my mind. The map for the underworld is so expansive. Not as expansive as the above-world, but not cheap, either. It’s not just a few rooms here and there. It’s easily half the size of the above-world. I must say that it isn’t nearly as filled, but that’s a plus in my book. One of my biggest complaints about the above-world is that the last third of the game feels like it’s very filler-y.

If the underworld were a game in and of itself, I would pay forty bucks for it. I have said before that for Ranni’s questline itself, I would pay thirty bucks, but that’s because it took me ten a dozen hours or more the first time I did it–and it includes a major boss who is optional, but someone you wouldn’t want to miss. A large portion of Ranni’s questline is in the underground, and it’s absolutely amazing. And necessary for what most people consider is the best ending (but not me).


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More about Elden Ring’s end game

I’m back, back again. More end game of Elden Ring. Yesterday, I wrote about *SPOILERS FOR THE END GAME* my least-favorite part of the game, Miquella’s Haligtree which has supposedly the hardest boss in the game, Malenia, Blade of Miquella.

By the way, the lore in this is much more straightforward, but also more complex than it is in other From games. That’s probably the George RR Martin influence. It’s very Game of Thrones-y in nature.

So. Malenia and Miquella are twins. Miquella is eternally young, almost a child. Their parents are Radagon and Marika (who are the same entity, but that’s something entirely different). There are another set of twins, Morgott and Mohg, the Fell Omens. Their parents are Marika and Goddfrey/Hoarah Loux. Mohg takes Miquella as his, ah, consort (kind of), which is the influence of GRRM, it is felt.

Anyway. Malenia has protected her brother from the very first, and that’s why she fights you when you come into her boss room. Or something. She’s an amazing boss. she’s stunning to look at and the beginning of her second phase will just give you chills. She becomes the Goddess of Rot, and she is terrifying in her beauty. She’s also naked and has wings.

I have not had problems with her, but I’ve only fought her twice. The first time was in NG on my faith-based character. I used Swarm of Flies, the Mimic Tear, and walked backwards. I didn’t come within five miles of her lethal combos. See, if she hits you, she gets health back. Even, apparently, if you block her, she gets some back. Or maybe it’s only if you don’t have a hundred percent block shield.

Anyway, I had girded my loins to fight her because I had heard how difficult she was. I beat her in fifteen or so real tries, and I was like, “That’s it?” But, again, I didn’t have to get close to her, so that mitigated a lot of the challenge. Still. I was quite proud of myself and left her alone for the rest of my runs. Until the end of NG+ (after I got the plat, much later. Like two days ago later). I was at her boss door, and I thought, why not? I summoned two humans and got her on the second try. As I mentioned yesterday, the first time, one person peaced out at the end of the first phase and then the other person did as well. I’ve had this happen to me quite a lot in the end game. No idea why. My unkind thought is that they want to fuck with me (not me specifically, but anyone summoning) just to make the boss harder.

My more kind thought is that they are running out of pots and don’t want to grind it through in the second phase, the first person, I mean, and then the second person doesn’t want to deal with the jacked up boss with just me. Either way, though, it’s annoying as fuck. I let Malenia kill me so I could summon again, making sure not to get the same people.

On the second go, it was smooth until late in the second phase. I got cocky and decided to see if I could Wolf’s Assault her. She came at me and sliced me until I only had the magic pixel. How rare was it that the magic pixel was on my side! I hurriedly healed as my summons took care of Malenia. We got her in short order, and I got 750,000 Runes! I’m still amazed at that. That’s only 2 levels, but still! I made it to a million, and I’m considering going further with it.


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The thing about Elden Ring’s end

Continuing on discussing the end game of Elden Ring. There will be SPOILERS all over the place. Yesterday, I made it up to the Fire Giant, who is the gatekeeper to the end game. So much so that you should make sure that you have all your bits and pieces in order before proceeding past him. Seriously. Everything will change at this point, and you will not be able to go back to certain things.

Ok. I’ll just say it. Once you go past this point, then the capital city will fall to ashes. You will be cut off from certain areas. To be more specific, Leyndell Royal Capital turns into Leyndell, Ashen Capital. Also, if you have chosen to do the Three Fingers before this point, Melina will not assist you at the Forge of the Giants. You can still go forward, but you will have lost her.

At least that’s what I remember and got out of it. Anyway, I will own again that a lot of this is the fact that I inhaled the game as quickly as possible. Not only because it was so fucking good, but because that’s my personality. If I get into something, then I GET INTO SOMETHING. I becmoe obsessed and can’t let it go. I was playing it four to five hours a day in the beginning because I could not get enough.

And maybe I had too high of expectations going into the end game as well. I’m trying to remember when I did the last optional area. Probably after the Fire Giant. Or at the same time (jumping back and forth).

I had heard about Malenia, of course. But what I hadn’t heard about was how terrible the lead up to her was. I am going to be brutally honest about this. The area is hot trash. I’m doing it currently in NG+ and summoned two humans for her. Here’s the weird thing, and I don’t know if this is just on PC, but once we got to the end of her first phase, one person peaced out, and then the other did.

I’ve had this happen to me so many times for the end bosses in NG. I have no idea why. I think it might be the first summon leaves to be a jerk and then the second leaves becasue it’s too hard with the added boss health and defenses with one summon down. But I had it happen so many times. So many fucking times. I just let her kill me because there was no way I was going to beat her on my own, not when she was so buffed up. Well, not at all, but especially not then.


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The best and worst of Elden Ring

I had a marathon session of Elden Ring last night. For whatever reason, I really want to see credits roll (after 175 hours, I think I’ve earned it) so I’ve been chugging through the main storyline as best as I can. I previously thought that the area I was in was the last area (that was my impression before going into it), but I was confused because I knew of at least two other areas. Were they optional areas maybe? It didn’t seem like it from the little I’d gleaned about them. One in particular seemed like it was a real place. Or rather, a critical area. In addition, I hadn’t met half the main bosses I knew I had to defeat, so what the hell? As I worked my way through what I had thought was the last area, it dawned on me that it wasn’t, indeed, the last area. It also dawned on me that I had no idea how to make progress within said area. There was a particular loop I had done for an hour without finding the next place to go. And the enemies were whomping me at every turn. Not only were some of them just that hard in and of themselves (which they were), but also there were relentless mobs of them, and it wasn’t possible to draw one away all the time.

Side Note: There is a spell in Dark Souls III called Hidden Body (also in the original game), which is pretty self-explanatory. It makes you mostly invisible.  Couple it with the Slumbering Dragoncrest Ring that muffles your footprints, and you can sneak around with abandon around enemies. Both are available in Elden Ring. The former is called Unseen Form and the latter is Crepus’s Vial (a talisman, this game’s version of a ring). There is, apparently, also a talisman that lengthens the duration of sorceries That’s the same as the Lingering Dragoncrest Ring in DS III, but I don’t have it yet. In other words, it’s firmly in end-game content.

In DS III, with all of this equipped, I could run around with abandon, only engaging with enemies on my terms. In Elden Ring, it may work or it may not, depending on, uh, I don’t know. Sometimes enemies will spot me right away. Sometimes, they won’t. I can sneak past some without them noticing whereas others will turn on me in an instant. It1’s more frustrating than a nerf across the boards because I don’t know when it’ll be great and when it won’t.

Anyway. I was trying t o get through this area on my own, but I just could not find the next place. I literally was looping around again and again, getting increasingly frustrated. One thing that annoyed the fuck out of me was that they put a previous field boss right next to a Site of Lost Grace. Even using my sorcery/talisman combo, I could not be guaranteed that he wouldn’t see me. If he caught up to me, he could chop me to death with his two massive cleavers (hello, cut-rate Capra Demon) in two hits. Now, I know I have a tiny health bar with less than 30 Vigor, but that’s just not on. Sites of Grace are supposed to be safe havens. Putting a nasty ex-boss outside one is just mean. It’s not the only time it happens, but it’s especially irritating when I’m trying to figure out where the fuck I’m trying to go.


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Frustrations with Elden Ring

I made it to the final area of Elden Ring. I have known for some time what it is, but have avoided it. I kind of knew how to get there, but not really. Last night, I decided to find it. I looked up the wikis and found out that I had reached the field boss who was guarding the entrance, but I had noped out of the fight for several reasons. One being that it was a copy-and-paste boss of a much earlier boss, and I think we all know my feelings about that particular phenomenon. The other reason was that I used so much stuff just to get to that point, I knew I couldn1’t take him at the time.

Last night, though, I was ready. I got him down to about a quarter health the first time I fought him, but his bullshit homing lightning stopped me (literally) in my tracks. I have mentioned more than once that I do not like being able to be one-shot by bosses, and it’s very common in this game. I went the first half of the game under 20 health, which is laughable. I finally took the time to beef up my vit, er, vigor? It’s Vigor in this game (it changes all the damn time).

I was done with the boss fights by this point. I always get this way late in From games because they are so grueling. In this case, it’s also because my perspective has changed from my medical trauma. It’s more difficult for me to beat my head against a wall repeatedly without thinking it’s a waste of time. I did it with a late-game boss a few nights ago and while it felt great at the time (when I finally killed the boss), it wasn’t something I wanted to repeat any time soon.

Anyway. I looked up how to beat this boss. There was a very cheesy cheese that involved Poison Mist–which I did not have. I went and got it, but I didn’t want to cheese THAT hard. I watched another video on how to do it easily, and their suggestion was to stick as close to the boss as possible in the second half of the fight. The boss would want to pull away so it could do its ranged attacks and would be unhappy with you sticking to dat ass. Which, ironically, is how you beat many Dark Souls bosses. Circle around the boss and smack dat ass.

Anyway, with my Mimic Tear summon and my smack dat ass strategy, I tore up this boss in about fifteen seconds. It barely had time to go into its second phase, let alone fry me with homing lightning. I was quite pleased with my performance, and my first step into the last area was breathtaking.


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Hades: more game for your game

A week after I saw the credits roll in Hades, I’m still firing it up every day. Why? A little for the combat, somewhat because it’s soothing and comforting (it’s my new Binding of Isaac), but mostly for the lore. That sweet, sweet, Greek lore. Again, this is all going to be spoilers if you haven’t seen the credits and played beyond it. Fair warning before I jump into the meat of the post. All spoilers, all the time. Spoilers for DAYS.

You’d think with all the content I’d experienced so far that SuperGiant would be satisfied to rest on their laurels and say, “Good job, us!” with a satisfied nod. It took me roughly fifty hours to see end credits because I am bad at the game. Or I was. Now, I win more runs than not and my personal best was five wins in a row. I’m on Heat 7 with the sword, which–ok. I need to explain this. One of the genius touches of the game is how they do NG+ and beyond. Most games just start you at the beginning again and make the enemies harder. In a roguelike, there may not be any NG+ at all. In this game, each run is called a heat. The first is Heat 0 (which I call Heat Zero for clarity), which is your basic New Game. There are four floors with a boss at the end of the floor. When you beat the final boss, a mechanic called the Pact of Punishment is introduced and it has modifiers that increase the heat. You can increase as much as you want, but you’re only going to get the rewards for the appropriate heat. So, in this case, Heat 1, you need one pain point. My go-to is adding what is essentially a shield to each enemy which means they can take one free hit.

Also, you have to beat each heat (well, except Heat Zero) with each weapon in order to advance to the next heat with that weapon. There are different aspects of each weapon, including hidden ones. I have to say, I love the hidden aspects of the weapons because they’re named for famous people. Like the sword’s hidden aspect is Excalibur, wielder, Arthur. The spear is a really interesting one. Guan Yu. Gives you much more power, but a third of your health. So you’re very much a glass canon. Ugh. I just read how to unlock one of the hidden aspects I don’t have and it’s not going to be fun. At all.

This is one complaint I have about the game. The grind gets super grindy. At this point, I’m pretty much over the combat and am in it for the lore. I’ve united Orpheus and Eurydice, and I’ve done the same with Achilles and Patroclus. I’m having an interesting relationship with Dusa, the Gorgon head who is a helpful maid in the House of Hades. I’ve been giving her Nectar/Ambrosia (how to bond with people) and while she’s appreciative at first, she then tells me she can’t take it because it makes Nyx mad. What, huh? Why does Nyx not want me talk to Dusa? I haven’t figured that out yet, but at least she’s allowed to talk to me again.


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