Underneath my yellow skin

Tag Archives: physical health

Health, mental and physical, and martial arts

Posted on by • 0 Comments

I’m talking about trying to be more healthy in general. I mentioned at the end of the last post that there are three things I really like a great deal. They are: writing, FromSoft games, and martial arts weapons. I already said thatt FromSoft games would be the first to go because there are tons of other games in the world. Yes, they’are not as good as FromSoft games for the most part, but there are still some really fucking good games out there. And, as I mentioned in many past posts, I’m reaching the end of actually being able to play From games so that’s easily the first one I  would drop.

*SPOILERS*

Also, they are starting to buy more and more of their hype, especially in the DLCs. Shadow of the Erdtree was incredible for design and layout. The environments were amazing. Stunning, even! The bosses, on the other hand…..eh. I mean, there are a few that are distinctive in design  such as the Putrescent Knight and Midra. They are really a sight to behold, though fight-wise, not that impressive. I think it’s because I was a caster and did not have to get up in their respective grills. Also, I fought them later than I probably should have if I wanted to play the game in a natural way. Same with Bayle. There is so muuch talk about him, and people had such trouble with him. He’s the biggest baddest dragon in all the lands. He wears one of Placidusax’s (badass optional dragon fight in the main game) heads around his neck (I think? He’s definitely wearing it somewhere) as a warning to the other dragons.

Also, there’s an NPC associated with this boss fight whom everybody loves. You first hear him (the NPC) howling on the road abotu pain and agony and how much he hates Bayle. In fact, he can’t stop going on and on about Bayle. CURSE YOU BAYLE!! There’s a funny story about how the voice actor was told to push it as hard as possible without being told why. You can tell in his voice read. And if you do his questline correctly, you can summon him for the fight. He’s the biggest hypeman you’ll ever have to help you out.

Did I love him the way everyone else does? No. Is he pretty dang cool? Yes. He’s this game’s version of Solaire, and I’ve made myself pretty clear how I feel about Solaire. Everybody loves Solaire. He is most people’s number one favorite NPC in the first game. He is not in my top five, which is not something I tell people very often. It’s Laurentius, Quelana, Onion Knight, Big Hat Logan, and…..Patches! Of course it’s Patches. Yes, I put Patches before Soliare. It’s not that I like Patches, per se, but that he’s the one constant in all the games.

Anyway. Yeah, FromSoft games are the first to go out of them, writing, and martial arts weapons. This is where we get real with it. Which would I give up next? I’ve thought about it, but I can’t give an honest answer. Writing has been a struggle for me since my medical crisis. Not my blogging, but my fiction writing. It is just not coming to me the way it used to, and it’s frustrating as fuck. I’m trying. Lord knows I’m trying.

I’m not happy because it used to flow freely before my medical crisis. I had stories in my head for days, and I could write 2,000 words a day with ease. when I buckkled down, I could do that in two hours. Usually, it was more like four, but that was fine with me. I did it at night like clockwork. I can still do the writing now, but it’s just hot shit. Honestly. Not even just first draft horseshit. It’s utter horseshit.

I can still write. I have written. I will write. Buut it’s just not good, and it hurts my heart. I have been writing since I was seven. I don’t know who I would be without it.


Continue Reading

Bagua is my bag (for real)–bait and switched again

Posted on by • 0 Comments

Yesterday, I was going to write about Bagua and then went completely off the rails. Well, not completely. It was tangential to what I was talking about, but it did relate. I was writing about my mother’s ability to gaslight me about past events, but with utter sincerity on her part.

Because of this, I question everything. This is both a good and a bad thing, sometimes at the same time. There is that meme about the ‘well, actually’ guy, but that is me. I know enough not to say it out loud all the time, but it’s constantly in my mind. I recognize that it’s not a trait that other people find endearing. Hell, I find it annoying sometimes. But I also find the lack of nuance irritating. Also, I said this to an online friend, I was raised to not voice my opinion by parents who were deeply sexist. Their culture in general was sexist at the time (Taiwanese) as was American culture. My parents were reactionaries, even in their own culture.

When I started Taiji, I had a million questions for my teacher. And I was clearly skeptical about everything she had to say. She remained cheerful and would answer my questions endlessly. If she did not know the answer, she would say that she would find out for me. I really appreciated that she didn’t try to shine me on or bluff her way through an answer.

My first Taiji teacher was…terrible. I won’t get into why because I’ve talked about it before, but one thing I really disliked about him as a teacher was that he put on this ‘I am the wise master who knows everything’ attitude that he had not earned. His Taiji was solid, but he as a person was not. He was scum, quite honestly, and I should have quit a lot sooner than I did.

His personal issues aside, he was not a good teacher, either. He would never say that he did not know something or that something was beyond him. In addition, I was in the beginners class and never learned the whole form. Why? Beacause the teacher would keep starting from the beginning. He said that since it was the beginner’s class, it was for beginners. In restrospect, maybe I should have moved to a different class, but at the same time, you would think that a beginners class would actually show the whole form

That was the least of my issues, though. The biggest issue was that he wsa a sexist asshole. And his tutor was also a sexist asshole. Or rather, did not think of things from the female point of view. I have huge boobs. Like, in my way huge. Don’t get me wrong. I love my boobs. They are amazing! Who doesn’t like boobs? But if a movement calls for me to put my arm straight across my chest, well, we’re going to have to discuss some accommodations. I once asked the tutor about it, and he got all flustered and had some flippant response.


Continue Reading

Bigger faster stronger

Posted on by • 0 Comments

Yesterday, I was talking about my daily routine. How it’s gone from five minutes of stretches a day to over an hour of stretches, Taiji (solo form and weapons), and now Bagua. I was feeling a bit bored with my routine, so adding Bagua has really spiced it up. Oh, also the weight-bearing set. It’s only three lifts on each side, ten reps each, I started with an 8-pound weight and now have upped it to 10 pounds for two of the three lifts. My teacher has told me that 8 pounds is fine, but I like doing a bit more. I used to lift 20 pounds for certain exercises. I think I even made it up to 25 pounds. THis was more than a decade ago, and I don’t think it’s a good idea to jump to it immediately.

My teacher said that Master Choi, the man who invented this weight set, used to do it with 50 pound weights. Back in the day, he felt the need to be pumped up because there were always young guns who had something to prove. That’s one thing about being a dude–there were always other men who wanted to challenge you to a duel, so to speak.

I will say that adding the weight-bearing set and the Bagua has pumped up my energy. It really is like having another cup of coffee. I have to be careful to do the Bagua early in the routine because if I do it too late, then it can affect my sleep. It’s funny because caffeine doesn’t affect my sleep at all. I can drink coffee all night without a care in the world. But Bagua can really mess with me so I’ve been pushing it earlier and earlier.

It’s funny. My teacher taught me to walk the circle with the DeerHorn Knives the third or fourth year I was studying with her. It was to replace meditation, which I could not do without having terrible flashbacks. Walking the circle centered me and gave me energy. And I adored the deerhorn knives with all my heart.

They are probably my favorite weapon overall. If I had to do a quick ranking, it would be those and the double sabers. The sword is a sentimental favorite because it’s the one that ignited my love for all things bladed (er, and poke-y). It’s my first love, which means it’ll always have a special place in my heart. And, I appreciate the saber more than I did when I first learned it. It will never be my favorite, but it’s a powerful weapon. I like the fan a lot, and I hate the cane. I am also fond of the karambit, which is not Taiji. I like the staff/spear, but I haven’t done much with it yet. Oh, and it’s fun to do the Wu-Li (dancing) Sword Form, especially when I just put on a song and dance.


Continue Reading

The disappearing thin line

Posted on by • 0 Comments

In the time of this pandemic, there is one thing that has become clear to me–more information is not always better. Or rather, the constant influx of information from everyone and their mother is not helping. There is so much confusion as to what are the best practices and more to the point, why they are the best practices. Like, I knew I should wash my hands a ton, but wasn’t sure why exactly. I mean, getting Covid-19 by contact exposure is rather low on the list of how to get it. So why all the hand-washing? It’s mostly because of touching your hand to your face and protecting from it. Speaking of which….

My BFF sent me an article boiling down some of these conflicting ideas. It’s really the best thing I’ve read on the topic, and I’m pretty sure it’s not just because it confirms much of what I already thought. It addressed something that I had been confused about, but could not find a satisfactory answer in all my Googling. My question was if I self-isolated and did not leave the house for, say, three weeks (and let’s pretend I haven’t gotten any deliveries in that time). If I did not get sick in that time, would it be fine to assume that I was not going to get it? And the answer is yes.

Basically, my home would be a safe place because no new exposure was happening. The author of the article wants people to consider their home their safe places and to do whatever they need to do in order to keep it safe. Wearing masks and gloving up when outside (but also understanding that they aren’t 100% solutions), then disposing of them (or washing them) properly before entering the safe place. Once you’re in the safe place, however, you don’t have to follow the stringent practices you do in exposure zones. In other words, you can touch your face in your safe place. You don’t have to wash your hands any more than you normally would. It confirmed my hunch that I couldn’t get it without new exposure, which makes inherent sense.

In addition, the mask is mostly for the person wearing it if they are sick in order to keep their germs to themselves. It’s helpful to other people, but to a much lesser degree. It’s more important to stay at least six feet away from others (preferably ten) at all times, and if you are wearing a mask/gloves, to wash your hands once you get home. For twenty seconds. The most important thing about the touching your face advice is to not do it when you’re in exposure zones (the author calls them danger zones). Which includes not touching your mask if you’re wearing one. If you’re wearing gloves, touch as little as possible with them and then make sure they’re off before you go into your house.

Another thing I’ve seen a lot of back and forth about is deliveries. Takeout and grocery mostly, but also just packages in general. I’ve had the habit of putting what needs to be refrigerated in the fridge straight in, but the bags are living in the garage, and if I don’t have to bring the item inside, it stays in the garage as well for several days. It’s overkill, but if I don’t need it, then it might as well live in the garage. In the article above, it says that leaving the package out in the sun for two minutes will kill off most of virus particles (grossly simplified). Also, if a package is not damp, it should be fine in general. If you store it in a cold and damp environment like the basement, it’ll be fine in 2 1/2 hours. And wash your damn hands afterwards.

But really, stay six feet away from other people.  Better yet, stay at home. That really is the best thing you can do in these trying times. If you can’t stay at home, then stay six feet away from others and don’t touch your face. If you can wear a mask and gloves, that’s good. If not, use hand sanitizer liberally. And don’t touch your face!


Continue Reading