Underneath my yellow skin

I’m as cold as ice

It’s 69 degrees (nice) and I’m a happy clam. It’s still outside my comfort zone, but after two weeks of over a hundred, I’ll take it. Being outside didn’t make me want to claw my own face off and I could actually feel a nice breeze. I fucking hate summer. We get a hundred day here and there, but nothing like the last two weeks. Even with air con, a fan blowing high, ice water, ice packs, and as little clothing as possible, it’s miserable. I can’t think in the heat–it feels as if my brain is frying. It makes me snappish, irritated, and unable to concentrate.

Even though the weather is much more tolerable, it’s still not fun for me. I’m fine with 20-50 degrees, but I prefer it under that, honestly. Down to zero is nice and then it’s a bit nippy when it gets to sub-zero temps. I talked to Kat Friday night and we reminisced about how back when we used to go out, we’d have such a different reaction to the weather. She’s a Florida gal and revels in the heat. When we went out in the summer, I would be whining and moaning about the heat, barely able to move while she would be flitting around, clearly in her element. In the winter, however, the shoe was on the other foot. She would be hunching over, shivering, demanding to know why my spine wasn’t scrunching up. I, on the other hand, would be in my element and loving it.

As I grow older, my ability to deal with cold gets less attuned*, but my ability to deal with heat hasn’t gotten better at all. If anything, it’s gotten worse. I would love to live in a place where the weather never rose about 50 degrees.

Let’s talk demos. Still trying them out and I really dig it. I can play a game for ten minutes or an hour and not have to commit to it. During the Steam Next Fest, there are so many demos! This is both a good thing and a bad thing. It’s good because I can try out any game that catches my eye without plunking down money for it. It’s bad because, well, there are so many bad games out there. That ain’t throwing shade at video games because that’s the case with, well, everything. 98% of pop culture is pure crap. That’s just the way it goes.

I have not found another demo that really sparked my interest so I uninstalled the half dozen I tried without a second thought. I will say that I’ve had an eye on RAD by Double Fine because I really enjoy the graphics and the style of the game. However, it’s Double Fine–which makes me wary. I tried their game, Broken Age, which was so hyped–and I really disliked the storytelling. It, too, looked gorgeous, but the gameplay and the story were both not great. The reviews are mostly positive, but the negative reviews hit on things that would bother me.

My left thumb is nearly 100% and science is a marvel. A month ago, I could not move my thumb on its own and it was with pain that I could move it at all. It was achy and tender all the time, and when it could move on its own, it clicked. Now, I can wiggle it to my heart’s content. It’s a tiny bit tender upon touch, but it doesn’t hurt at all. I’m so relieved. Even if it had stopped at 80% healed, I would have considered it a success.

This means I have started slowly adding back the left side of weapons to my morning routine. I’m being careful because I do not want to trigger the issue again, but, man, it’s great to be able to do it again. I hated having to stop because it felt as if I was putting a roadblock to my own success. Oh, and I’m able to do double saber again. I am so happy about that. This is going to sound strange but one of my favorite songs to use for practicing weapons forms is Carly Rae Jepson’s Call Me Maybe. It’s just so upbeat and makes my heart smile. It puts a pep in my step and it keeps me moving. Also, I love the video because it usurps the usual trope of a meet cute between a boy and girl that I appreciate. It was made in 2102 before the current explosion of pro-LGBT+ and genderfluidity movements so her putting a hot gay dude into her video was really cool. Also, I could hard relate to falling for the gay guy. Been there, done that, wrote the book.

I love my taiji weapons and I will always be grateful for one thing during this awful pandemic–that I decided to focus on learning the weapons. One of my flaws is that it’s really hard to motivate myself to do anything, even if it’s something I want to do. So, while I’ve always loved taiji weapons, I didn’t put the work in. Yeah, I learned the Sword Form, but that was in class and it came easily to me. Learning the movements, I mean. Mastering them? Still not there yet. Even when I took private lessons once every other week in the Before Times, I did just what I was learning during the off-time. It was only when the pandemic started that I pulled together my weapons routine–which I’m constantly adding to.

Now that my left thumb is nearly back to normal, I can start teaching myself the left side of the Sabre Form once again. I have a hunch this is going to be more difficult than teaching myself the left side of the Sword Form. Why? Because the Sword Form was intuitive to me and the Sabre Form was not. It went much better the second time I learned it, but I still did not bond with it the way I did the Sword Form. I’m feeling a similar connection to the Double Sabre form that I did with the Sword Form, which bodes well for eventually teaching myself the left side of that form.

I’m working on the left side of the Wu-Li Wudang Sword. I’ve taught myself the whole thing, but it’s still rough. I still have to learn the last row of the Karambit Form. My teacher says she’ll teach it to me once she figures out a few things and once we start meeting in person again. I cannot wait.




*Meaning that I can’t tolerate sub-zeros as well.

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