Underneath my yellow skin

Social Media Addiction and Me

social media all day long.
You were always on my mind.

I woke up this afternoon (Saturday) and forgot what day it was. I went about my morning routine, and then as I was on the toilet, I checked Twitter as I usually do. A few minutes later, I remembered that it was Saturday and that I was NOT going to check social media on Saturdays. Oops. Now, I could have just said, “Fuck it, I’ll do it tomorrow”, but I didn’t want to fall down that rabbit hole. I decided I’d just stop and not look any longer.

Easier said than done. It’s so embedded in my genetics now, any time I’m on the toilet, I almost automatically check Twitter. I don’t know why the two are connected (shit on shit?), but it’s a reminder for me that I need to be more mindful about my social media usage. It’s become like second nature to me, and I have to stop myself from checking. It’s weird because when I’m not checking, I don’t think about it. The minute I’m on Twitter and/or Facebook, I get sucked in, and I waste way too much time scrolling through my feed/TL.

Right now, I’m fine. I haven’t looked at social media in a few hours, and I don’t care. We’ll see how I am in a few more hours.

Oh! Funny note. I sent my father a Father’s Day e-card to my mother’s email because my father doesn’t do email, and my mom called me that night saying all she saw was a pink background. I was puzzled, and I told her to check the flash thing we had to deal with the last time as well. It wasn’t that, so I told her to try to open the card again from the email. Then, she said she couldn’t find my email, and she spent a few minutes looking for it. I sent her another version of the card, and then she realized that she was looking for my name, but the emails were being sent by the website. So, the other email didn’t disappear; it just wasn’t sent directly by me. It still wouldn’t work, so I sent the same card to myself to see what was the problem.

Side note: I know I can take control of her computer, but I didn’t want to do it for two reasons. One, I don’t want to set up the software. Yes, that’s a lazy reason, but I think I’ve established I’m a lazy person. Two, I want her to learn how to do these things herself. I don’t want to just do them for her, even if that’s what usually ends up happening.

Anyway, I clicked on the card, and I only had the background as well. I refreshed the page, and then it loaded. YAY! I figured it out! Now, the next problem was explaining to my mother what she had to do to see the card. With someone with computer savvy, I would simply have to say hit the refresh button, but that’s not my mother. This is how I explained it to her. “You see the white bar at the top of the page? Where you put in the website’s address?” Fortunately, she knows what an address is, and, oh, I remember the days when she didn’t. Once I’ve confirmed this, I say, “See the i in the circle next to it?” We had just talked about this the last time I needed to help her with a card, so she knew what I meant. Unfortunately, she was panicking at this point, and she said, “Yes. The I. Should I right click it?” “No, Mom, don’t right–” “Right click it?” “No, Mom. Look next to the–” “Right click it?” “NO, MOM. DO NOT RIGHT CLICK IT.”

When my mom panics, she doesn’t listen at all. She tries to anticipate what I’m going to say and preempt me. I literally have to talk over her or repeatedly say mom until she finally shuts up. It’s very frustrating. Once we moved past the i in a circle, I said, “Do you see the arrow that is circular next to–” “Should I right click it?” And we had to do that song and dance again. Once I actually got her to click on the reload button, she could see the card. It’s frustrating and funny at the same time.

9:55 p.m.

I haven’t had any impulse to check my social media since I last wrote, which was about 4 p.m. As I wrote before, the longer I go without checking Twitter and Facebook, the less I have an impulse to actually check it. I may have to extend this to another day. Maybe.

Sunday, 2:18 p.m.

I made it through the rain, er, night, with no desire to check social media. I’ve looked at my notifications today, but not my TL or feed yet. I don’t really want to because I know I’m going to be plunged back into poutrage.

What have I been doing instead? Watching a shit-ton of RuPaul’s Drag Race. I have much to say about it, but that’ll be a separate post. All I’ll say right now is that I’m #TeamKimChi and most of these girls are so fucking creative. It really is an art. Oh, and I’m also #TeamJinkxMonsoon. You can tell which seasons I’ve watched. I am not a fashionista at all–at all!–but I’m amazed by what these girls can whip together with a bit of fabric, some sequins, and a hot glue gun. It makes me want to sew! No, it doesn’t, but I can admire the creations from afar.

I think next week, I’m going to expand to taking Sunday off as well.

*deep breath*

I have thought about giving up social media for good. I don’t think I’ll reach that point, but pruning back on it on a daily basis along with giving ┬áit up on Saturdays has been really good for me.

 

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