Ed. Note: I was really sick for the past few weeks, which is why there haven’t been any POOG posts for the past few Fridays. I apologize, but I had temporarily misplaced my funny bone, so any POOG post during that time would have consisted of me whining about my health. Where’s the fun in that, I say? Don’t worry, though! I’m on the mend and have found my sense of humor again.
I’ve been pretty sick lately, and it’s only in the past few days that I’ve felt anything close to human again. I like to joke that I had aliens chewing on my face, but that’s pretty much how it felt. I’m sure you all know just how gross you can feel when you’re sick. There are extraneous effluvia pouring out of various orifices, and it’s a good day when I was able to pass a brush through my hair. You know what else suffered from my sickness? My vag. I didn’t pay it any attention as I lay moaning on the couch, and the only time I cared about it was when I had to pee but didn’t have the energy to wobble to the bathroom.
Now, finally, I’m climbing out of the abyss, and I can give my vag the attention she so properly deserves. I’ve noticed that she’s been looking quite peaked lately, probably due to the recent illness, so I’ve decided for this post to give her a makeover to make her look and feel better! That’s right–I’ve decided to vajazzle. I know it’s an older trend, but I’m going to try to bring it back like Justin Timberlake brought SexyBack! Do the kids even know who Justin Timberlake is these days? For those who don’t know, check it out.