If you can’t say anything good about someone, sit right here by me.
–Alice Roosevelt Longworth*
Conventional wisdom says if you don’t have anything nice to say about someone, you shouldn’t say anything at all. Most of us don’t live by this creed, but it rears its head more strongly when that person is terminally ill or has just died.
I bring this up because Senator John McCain is battling brain cancer, and he interrupted his recovery to rush back to DC to vote on whether or not the Senate should proceed with a vote on the nonexistent Obamacare repeal and replace bill. There’s a lot of insider baseball as to why this is appalling, but suffice to say, many people were not pleased about this. Several people pointed out the irony of a man who enjoys a lifetime of luxury health insurance paid for by the taxpayers rushing off his death bed to champion the right to take away health insurance from millions of Americans, and it did not go over well in certain sectors. Namely, old school media.
Let me preface by saying I wasn’t jubilant when I found out McCain had brain cancer. It made sense because he had appeared so befuddled at an earlier confirmation session (can’t remember which one. Sorry), and I thought it might be dementia. I was sad for him and wished him well, but it didn’t change my basic feelings about him–he’s a contrarian who enjoys acting all mavericky until push comes to shove, and then he votes with his party more often than not. In addition, he’s a petty man who really couldn’t handle losing to Obama in 2008, and he never got over it. I wrote about him many years ago, and my feelings about him haven’t changed.
When he gave a speech that journalists jizzed over, but then voted for the procedure to continue, anyway, there were some people (all white dudes. Not a judgment–just an observation) who said to wait and see. They thought McCain would eventually do the right thing in the end, that he really was just voting for procedure. Later that night, he voted yes on the repeal and replace bill, which didn’t surprise me one whit.
McCain is a craven politician, and he’s not been kind to vets among other people. He gives good interview, and he’s relatable to a certain portion of the population (again, white dudes), so they give him an endless benefit of the doubt. The journalists miss swinging on the tire swing with him, which is another reason they’re so soft on him. Not to mention the brain cancer thing. There was a woman on Twitter, an editor at BuzzFeed, I think, who scolded people for saying mean things about McCain. You can probably guess the response she got to her tweet.
I actually agree that saying I hope he dies soon or rooting for cancer isn’t cool, and it’s not something I would ever do–well, until the death of this president, perhaps, or Dick Cheney–but I think focusing on those sentiments is shortsighted. Most of them are fueled by righteous anger, and they are just words in the end. The people saying it aren’t going to kill McCain or do something that will cause him actual duress. On the other hand, what McCain is doing could end up in the death of millions of Americans.
I have a hard time with not saying anything negative about a dying/dead person. I don’t think you should attack the person in an egregious and spurious way, but also don’t think you should lionize someone and scrub away their flaws. As someone on Twitter said, you can have cancer and still be a bad person. I’ve said it many times in other situations, such as, you can be a minority and still be an asshole. The two aren’t mutually exclusive. You can get brain cancer and still be a petty, mean-spirited and bitter man. I can be saddened by the former and still point out the latter because I contain multitudes, bitchez!
My point is, what McCain is doing right now is horrendous, and the Republicans are cynically using the fact that he has brain cancer to give cover to their agenda. He gives a rousing (to some) speech, and it’s enough to hide the fact that what he’s stumping for is egregious in the first place. Him dying doesn’t make his actions automatically saintly, and the harm he might do in the long run needs to be pointed out. I don’t think it’s disrespectful to make that point while simultaneously hoping he recovers from his cancer.
It’s frustrating to see so many in the media more focused over style and decorum than substance. McCain has always made a grandiose show of being a maverick and questioning his party, but then he quietly votes with them more often than not. In addition, the reason he was so mavericky in the first place was because he felt betrayed when W. became the nominee and not him. His entitlement made him feel he deserved it, and he became bitter and petty when it didn’t happen.
I am on the side of truth. I don’t believe in softening someone’s image just because he’s dying, especially if he’s still doing harm–which McCain is. He’s a dick. He’s always been a dick. Him getting cancer doesn’t change that. I also don’t understand why so many liberals think he’s different that other Republicans, but as I said, he gives good interview.
He had one last chance to make his legacy something other than bitter old man trying to get revenge on the black man who bested him, but he chose to double down on the pettiness he’s exhibited all his life. We would like to believe in redemption and seeing the light when you’re on your deathbed, but more oftentimes, people just become more of who they are as they’re dying. That seems to be the case with McCain. There are still people who think he’ll pull a 180 at the eleventh hour, but I’m not holding my breath.
Addendum: I’ve decided to give up social media on Wednesdays as well as Saturdays. I’m writing this post on Wednesday so this is my first Wednesday social-media free. It’s not quite as easy as it is on Saturdays for whatever reason–probably because I’m not used to it yet. However, I find myself not as agitated when I’m not compulsively checking Twitter and Facebook, so it’s worth the weirdness I’m experiencing right now. Will report back how the rest of the day goes.
*The quote has more recently been credited to Dorothy Parker, but there’s evidence that it was popularized by ARL who had a pillow with it embroidered on it.