Tag: no pain no gain | A Banana Peeled

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When too hard is truly too hard

Posted on March 28, 2026 by Minna Hong • 0 Comments

I’ve been thinking about American exceeptionalism and how damaging it is. In this specific case, I want to talk about the difference between confidence and arrogance. There have been studies that show that women (and AFAB, I presume) often underestimate their abilities. Or rather, they don’t apply to jobs that they consider out of their reach whereas men do. That’s a gross simplification, but it’ll do for now.

Let’s talk about the Dunning-Kruger Effect (I promise you this is relevant). Everyone who has heard of it knows that it’s about people who really overestimate their own abilities and think that they are better at something (or all things) than they really are. What people don’t know, though, is the second result the researchers found. It’s that people who are really good at something (or things) vastly underestimate how much better they are at the thing than other people are.

It makes perfect sense as they both stem from the belief that (generic) you are the norm and everyone else skews towards the norm (you). In other words, it’s putting you at the center of the universe. I’m not even being angry about it because of course people will think of themselves as the norm. At least until they run into enough people who are vastly different than they are. Then, maybe, there might be a glimmer of hope. But, oftentimes, sadly, it’s just them dimissing everyone else as weird or outliers.

Do I sound bitter or pessimistic? Well, yeah. Look at the state of America right now. Why the hell wouldn’t I feel that way? The thing is, though, I have felt that for many decades. I’ve always looked at my country (and the world in general) with a jaundiced eye. It’s just how I am. I have always said that I’m a pessimist or a realist, but I had a friend in college tell me an optimist. When I protested, he pointed out that I expected the best out of people and was disappointed when I didn’t get it.

I opened my mouth to snap back, but then I closed it. Because you know what? He was right. I did expect people to do the right thing,and I was disappointed when they failed to do it. That’s what made me cynical, by the way. The fact that I thought people would do the right thing and then they didn’t. And this happened over and over again.

I, on the other hand, tended to think that I wasn’t anything special in any way and that if I could do something, other people could as well. sometimes, that’s true. Like with From games. If I can finish them, then truly anyone can. I am so bad at them. Astoundingly bad. So bad that why the fuck do I even play them? Ian and I have this argument from time to time. He says the games are exactly for people like me who can struggle with them and then feel real satisfaction when they beat the games.

Listen to my body talk

Posted on February 15, 2022 by Minna Hong • 0 Comments

One of the major tenets of Taiji (if not the major one) is to be as lazy as possible in your movements. My teacher has to emphasize this with Americans because our society is very much no pain, no gain–give it 110% (which drives me crazy when people say that because it is literally impossible. You cannot give more than your best. You just cannot.). She has to tell newcomers over and over again that the goal is not to push yourself or to go as hard as possible. One of the saying is, “No hurry, no worry.” When I told my mom that and the philosophy behind it, she immediately changed it to, “No hurry, no going too slowly” or some nonsense like that. Taiwanese culture is pretty go hard all the time as well. I sighed and told her that she got it wrong. There is no ‘too slowly’ in Taiji.

I’ll admit it. I’m pretty lazy to begin with so this saying appealed to me. But it makes sense in conservation terms as well. The point is not just to be lazy, but to use as little energy as possible to get the maximum result. So it’s not saying don’t use any energy as a general rule, but not to waste energy. It’s so American to push as hard as possible, which means wasting energy. If I can push something with an energy level of 2 to get it where I want it to go, why use a level 10 energy?

The point of this is that when I started Taiji, I had the mentality that I had to push myself as hard as possible. It took me several years to shake myself of that mentality and I still struggle with it sometimes. When I’m unsure of a move, I’ll instinctively go harder. Then I’ll relax, but it’s not easy.

It’s well-known that I don’t like the Taiji Solo Form. The long form, at least. I struggled with it for years and it’s still my least-favorite part of Taiji. In the first few years, I would hurt every time we did the Solo Form. It was in my back and sometimes my knees. It would start at the end of the first section and by the third section, I could barely move. For whatever reason, though, I kept it to myself and just tried to power through the pain. And this was pain, not just ache. I finally brought it up with my teacher maybe four years into my practice and she was able to suggest a few things that vastly helped the situation. One was that I was collapsing my knee or overextending it. The other was dropping my shoulders. By paying attention to one of these things every time I practiced, I was able to correct both problems (not 100%, but enough to make a vast improvement) and make it through the Solo Long Form without being in excruciating pain by the end.