Underneath my yellow skin

Fuck you, spring!

mainlining the tea.
All. The. Tea.

I hate spring. I hate summer more, but spring is almost as bad because everything is coming to life, and I’m allergic to all the green things. In addition, I’m still visiting Ian in upstate New York, so there is a bunch of native flora that doesn’t live in Minnesota. This is my long-winded way of saying that my allergies are on high. At least I hope it’s allergies. I think it is. My eyes are itchy and my throat is tickling. There is a drainage situation that is coagulating in the back of my throat. I’m feeling logy, even more so than usual.

The reason I’m hoping it’s allergies? Because the alternative is that I have a cold. Again. Or sinus issues. Again. Or any of half a dozen things that are worse than allergies. Allergies are a low-level energy drain. Sinus infection? That’s a massive hit in the gut. I also have a medium-grade headache that really intensifies right before I go to bed. I’ve taken two Excedrin Migraine (generic) almost every night I’ve been here which keeps the headache at bay, but it’s not something I want to do too often.

I have zero motivation when I’m sick/allergy-stuffed as well. I know I have shit I need to do, but I just can’t make myself do anything. Writing this post feels unbearable, and I’m just writing nonsense. I know I’m not, but that’s how it feels. I woke up about an hour ago, and I want a nap. That’s what makes me think I’m on the cusp of getting sick and not just suffering allergies. Allergies are annoying, but not soul-sapping the way getting sick is.

I’m flying back tomorrow, and I really would rather not have to do it while being sick. I’m sure the other people on the plane would be happier without me spreading the sickness as well.

Side note: Delta has this thing where if the flight is full, they’ll have you bid on your seat, meaning saying how much it would take for you to change your flight. Ideally, everyone would ask for the highest bid so someone will get that amount. Gamification theory indicates, however, that someone will lowball everyone so they will at least get something.

I hate flying. I was joking about how my actual flights here were an hour and fifteen minutes and fifty minutes respectively, whereas the total amount of time it took to get me from my house to Ian’s house was ten hours. The seats on the plane are so fucking small, it’s impossible to get comfortable. In addition, they took away all the free snacks, and have made flying as uncomfortable as possible so you’ll upgrade. On my second flight here,  it was one of those peashooter planes that rattle in the sky. We hit some gnarly turbulence, and I literally flew out of my seat. Or I would have if I didn’t have my seat belt on. It was like a roller coaster, but with deadly consequences. I made my peace and accepted that my life was finite. I kept looking at the flight steward because she was calm and collected; it made me feel better.

I just want to sleep. That’s another reason I think I’m sick. The only time I can sleep for more than seven hours at a time is when I’m sick. I just want to sleep and sleep and sleep. All the sleep. All the time. I’m crossing my fingers that I’m not actually getting sick–I have a feeling I probably will.




*That’s my interpretation of gamification theory, anyway.

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