In reading my stories this morning, I came across an article at Slate about Taylor Swift. Normally, I would just ignore it because I don’t care much about pop culture and the weird nitpicking Slate does with celebs. I don’t mean nitpicking at celebs is weird–but they choose to focus on weird things like the suit Obama wore in his inauguration photo. It wasn’t great, but it wasn’t terrible as they wasted thousands of words to say, either. It was just boring as fuck–which was the point, I would surmise.
Anyway, in this case, there was an article called, Why Does Taylor Swift Hold Her Pen Like That? It’s by Heather Schwedel, and her writing is…uh, incidental is the best way I can phrase it. That’s not entirely fair, but it’s like she’s dabbling at the fringes for the most part. Which is fine. Not everyone has to write about important and weighty issues, but it’s just strange how something like the way Taylor Swift holds a pen in her video spurs an article that includes interviews with occupational therapists.
First of all, the title of the article caused me to roll my eyes as the title of most Slate articles do. I know clickbait is the name of the game, but Slate is particularly egregious with this. Then, there is a question and an answer under the title and before the name of the author. Should we be concerned? We called up occupational therapists to find out.
The utter hubris of the question and the answer. Taylor Swift doesn’t need Heather Schwedel to be concerned about her health. Taylor Swift has access to the best doctors in the world. If there is an actual issue with the way she holds a pen, she is perfectly capable of fixing it on her own.
In addition, when I looked at the picture with the big arrow pointing to her hand, I had no idea what the problem was. I had to read the actual article and do some Googling to figure out the actual problem. Apparently, the ‘normal’ way to hold a pen is between the thumb and the middle finger with the first finger used as the stabilizer (or not).
This was an utter shock to me because that’s not how I hold a pen/pencil. I hold it between my thumb and ring finger with my middle finger as the stabilizer. I have been doing this all my life, and have never known this was the wrong way to hold a pen.
My mother, by the way, holds it like she does her chopsticks, in her fist. It’s oddly endearing and it does not impede her in any way.
For me, it’s a revelation only in that it probably explains why I have terrible handwriting. Oh, and I might have joint hypermobility. I knew I was double-jointed in my hands when I was a kid, but I never really thought about it. It was a party trick that I could make the middle knuckle of my hands bend backwards while the first knuckles bent forward. Plus, I can nearly touch the thumb of my left hand to my wrist. I used to be able to go all the way with that, but age takes it toll.
It doesn’t really matter, of course, because I rarely use a pen these days except on the very scant occasions when I need to write an actual check. Or when I take notes during my private Taiji lessons every other week. I forgot about that. But it’s still not writing much. And, more to the point, I don’t care.
Back to Taylor Swift. Apparently, The Federalist wrote an article about this calling her a psycho for holding her pen that way. Which is precious coming from The Federalist. Really. I would wear that as a badge of honor if they called me that.
I read the article. The one in Slate, I mean. And I couldn’t believe they wasted ink on that. I mean, I could because everything gets dissected these days, but writing roughly 1,700 words about how Taylor Swift holds a pen in a video is bonkers. Granted, apparently, she holds a pen this way often, but who. the. fuck. cares. Obviously, Swifties do, but are they reading Slate for their pop culture fix? I highly doubt it.
The vibe I get from Slate culture is ‘let me explain this for the clueless in the more enlightened class’, which may or may not be off-base. But it’s annoying as fuck. I know it’s on me for reading the article, but it’s the epitome of who the fuck cares? Yes, you could argue that it’s harmless and pure fluff, but I would argue that it adds to the dross that is out there.
Honestly.
All that ink spilled just to conclude that it was fine that Taylor Swift held her pen that way (again, as if she needs a Slate writer’s seal of approval for something she does. I cant’ get over how much the author wrote on what should have been a one-paragraph topic. And, yes, I know I’m writing a thousand-word post myself in response to it, but my point is to say enough with the fluff.
I love the internet. I think that is fairly clear. However, I hate how easy it is to post anything on it (and, yes, I know that it’s ironic and hypocritical for me to say this), brush your hands, and call it a day. I know I don’t have to read it. I know I did not even have to click on it. However, now that I’ve read it, I can’t get over how much effort she put into such an inane subject.
Back to me. It’s just one more way in which I’m a weirdo. Fortunately, it’s one in which I don’t care in the slightest. Yes, I write like a baby. So what? It’s something that doesn’t help or hurt anyone else, so I can’t imagine many people taking issue with it. Then again, I don’t see why my sexuality or gender or lack of children is any concern to anyone, either, but here we are.
I actually laughed when I read the article this morning. Imagine being that invested in something so meaningless. I know that authors have to scramble to find things to write about, but this is really scraping the bottom of the barrel. Taylor Swift puts out a new album, and you want to write about how she holds a fucking pen? Go off, I guess. If that’s the shit you want to put out in the world, go right ahead.