I have a confession to make. I’m the ‘well, actually’ person whom everyone hates. I know better than to say it out loud…most of the time. But I think it often. Whether it’s something factual that someone else has gotten wrong or a thought that was, well, not well thought out–I have a voice in my head that contradicts whatever is being said.
I also know that my taste in things is very different than most people’s. In part it’s because I don’t give a shit about white people stuff–especially white men. Honestly. In this day and age, if you can’t create without including anyone who isn’t a white straight person, then I am not interested.
When I saw Knives Out, I was bored out of my skull in part because, as I put it on Twitter, it was rich white people doing rich white people things. When I see a trailer for a new show, I automatically notice if there are no visible minorities. And, I will say it, color is very important to me. If a show can’t even have one black person, well, it’s not for me.
Look. I know white people can do good things. Believe me. I know that very well. I have watched, read, and listened to so. many. white. people. SO FUCKING MANY. I’m done. I’ve been done with white people for quite some time (creatively,I mean). When I was in college, I woke up to the notion that there was racism, sexism, homophobia, and other isms. It was a slap in the face, waking me up to the horrors of the world. I decided to read only Asian women for a hot minute, and the pushback I got was very interesting. One dude said that I was just being prejudiced but in reverse. He actually had the audacity to say that me only reading Asian womeen was just as bad as someone reading only white men.
I gave him my best stern glare and said, “I bet I’ve still read more dead white dudes than you’ve read women of color.” Not even Asian women, but any woman of color. This was back in the early ’90s, so I probably said minority women. He pressed his lips together and didn’t say anything because he knew I was right.
It’s interesting to me how white dudes default to only consuming white dude stuff. And by interesting, I mean it’s sad that it’s still the case in 2023. I’m not even saying it like an accusatory thing, but just that it’s so baseline, it’s unremarkable. I have to say, I find it to be even more true in England than in America, at least in terms of content creation.
Will I miss good shit? Yup. Will I miss really good shit? Yup. Do I care? Nope. Look. It’s fucking 2023. If you can’t include a person of color, a person who is not gay or straight, man or woman, or any of a million other ways in which people are divergent, I am not interested.
I could just leave it there, but I’ll expand a bit just because I can. Look. I am an old, fat, bisexual, agender, areligious, Taiwanese American. I don’t like most pop culture including the Marvel Universe, Star Wars, Gone Girl, and, yes, Knives Out. I have not seen the sequel, but I probably will at some point for the lulz. Maybe live tweet it. Though I don’t tweet at all these days.
But I’ll admit it. I don’t give a fuck. I keep tastefully silent when people gush about this shit (also about TV shows I never got, including Seinfeld, Breaking Bad, GoT, and The Sopranos), because I don’t want to yuck other people’s yum. At the same time, though, I do not like any of it.
I try to keep it to myself, but sometimes, I have to give a bland, “I am not a fan.” If someone really wants to know, I’d get into it, but most people really, really do not. I don’t understand why if I don’t like something someone else likes, it’s as if I don’t like them–the person, I mean.
My biggest example of this was Pulp Fiction. When I was in my late twenties, I dated a guy who said it was his favorite movie. This was several years after it had been released. I had a very negative reaction to the trailer when it came out, and I was pretty sure I would not like it. But, no one is at their best when in lust, and I was no different. I wanted that D, and I was willing to watch a movie I KNEW I would hate to get it.
I knew I was going to hate it. I knew it deep in my heart. I knew it with every fiber of my body. I hated the trailer. I hated how contrived and pseudo-cool it tried to be. It was just icky all around. The hyper-violence. The rampant sexism. The gore. It was everything I loathed in a movie. And, yes, igot all this from the trailer.
But. You know. Dick. I wanted it, and I was willing to do whatever to get it. To be kinder to me, I was eager to see why my boyfriend at the time liked it so much. He assured me that I would like it (as he did two other movies he dragged me to see that I hated. One I knew I’d hate ahead of time, the other I hadn’t heard of–but hated as I was watching it), so I went despite my doubts.
You will not be surprised to learn that I hated it. So much hatred. All the hate. He asked what I thought when the movie was done. I gave him my thoughts for the next ten minutes or so. He was quiet for a minute and then said, “I can’t be with someone with your world view.” Yup. I got dumped because I hated Pulp Fiction. Even though I had told him ahead of time that I probably wouldn’t like it. Didn’t matter. He thought he knew me better than I did. Same with The Titanic (I knew I’d hate it so hard. Not even Kate Winslet’s tits could save it) and Dangereous Beauty (the courtesan does not love you–it’s her job). We saw both of those ‘as friends’ after he dumped me, and it hammered home the point that we were incompatible.
The problem is, though, that nobody thinks the way I do. Even people who don’t like the things I don’t like, it’s rarely for the same reasons. I don’t want to explain myself because I always end up feeling like a freak. I mean, I am a freak, but I don’t need to be constantly reminded of it.
I don’t know if there is a compromise to be had, honestly. When you’re so far out of the mainstream as I am, there really is no point trying to be a part of it–at all. It’s easiest jsut to nod and smile, then move on without saying a word. That’s basiaclly how I deal with normies–it’s makes my life a hell of a lot easier.