Underneath my yellow skin

Tag Archives: pneumonia

Introducing fear

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Before my medical crisis, I had no idea what pneumonia felt like. Now that I do, any time I feel anything close to it, I worry. But also, it was such a unique feeling, anything compared to it is lesser. Which is both good and bad. “It’s not walking non-Covid-related pneumonia” is a pretty easy bar to clear, but that doesn’t mean that what I have is not something to worry about.

I feel like I did when I got the Covid shot. Not quite as bad, but the same symptoms. Chills and sweat, alternating. Fatigue and body aches. None of the more classic ones such as cough, runny nose, etc. I am sniffing more than normal, but no runny nose.

It could just be the crud. I am going to pick up a Covid test to see if it’s that. I will be both peeved and annoyed if it is Covid. Peeved because I just got the booster. Relieved because then I would at least know what it was.

I just took the test. It’s snowing out. That makes me happy, but it’s not going to stick around long, I have a feeling. But it’s certainly pretty and makes me feel very wintery, which I appreciate.

The test is fairly easy. It’s just swab the inside of the nose and then test it. Wait fifteen minutes and you get results. But you can mess up each step along the way if you don’t do it pproperly. And it’s fairly easy to fuck it up. I bought two in case I messed one up and also so I can test in a few days even if I’m negative with the first one. The only thing I had forgotten from the first time was that the ‘test tube holder’ was the package itself. Which I ripped open. Fortunately, I could craft it into a stand so it was no big deal.

I have taken a test before and tested negative. I know that doesn’t mean it’s necessarily negative as false negatives ar ea thing. This test is negative as well. Not even a whiff of a pink line for the test line. I will try again in a few days, but for now, will assume I don’t have it.

That doesn’t mean I don’t have something. Yes, Covid is a big worry, but there are other things, too. I don’t think it’s the flu given that from what I heard, it hits really hard. Maybe a bad cold? But it doesn’t feel like cold symptoms. That’s why I think it might be menoapause. I asked K about her symptoms when she had it, and she said it was exactly as I described. Body aches, fatigue, chills, and sweats. If I don’t feel better by Monday, I’ll see my doc.


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Not knowing how to react

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I woke up today with a stuffed nose. Normally, I would shrug my shoulders and get on with my day. I’d chalk it down to a cold or the beginning of bronchitis and move on with my day. Yesterday, I coughed a few times because I had something in my throat and my mother immediately commented both times. When I said I had something in my throat for a second time, she said, “You get things in your throat a lot.” Which, I mean, twice in several hours is not a lot, but even if it were, so what? It’s really annoying to have someone scrutinizing your every move and analyzing the hell out of it.

My voice has been a bit raspy since the hospital. Understandable as I was unconscious for a week and had a breathing tube in my nose for a week-and-a-half (different tube once I woke up, but still a tube). It has gotten better over time, but it comes back in times of stress. I had it yesterday; I’m not sure why. I wasn’t particularly stressed.

Anyway, as I said, I woke up today with a stuffy nose and a bit of a sore throat. It would normally not be a big deal except the thing that started off my whole medical ordeal was pneumonia. Non-COVID-related. I sent an email to my Taiji teacher the Tuesday before I went into the hospital that I was feeling unusually exhausted. I’m tried all the time, but not like that. I could barely keep my eyes open and I wanted to sleep all the time. I thought it was my imagination, but it was non-COVID-related pneumonia.

Here’s the thing. My mom is obsessed with the fact that we don’t know what triggered it so how can we prevent it? While I was impatient with her when it came to dismissing my home nurse, she’s not wrong. We don’t know what caused it so it’s hard to know how to prevent whatever happened from happening again.


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In the beginning

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It’s been a minute, hasn’t it? My last post is from September 3rd, which is the day my life changed. I’m not exaggerating, by the way. I know it sounds like hyperbole, but if anything, I’m underselling it. You se, I was in the hospital and unconscious a few hours after this was posted. It’s a lot for me to digest and even though I’ve been home three weeks, I’m still mulling over what happened.

I’m not ready to get into all the gruesome details, but suffice to say that I was unconscious for a week in ICU, woke up, and spent another week in PCU regaining myself to the point where I could be discharged. The first few days I was awake, there was talk of intensive physical therapy (PT) and other therapies as well (including occupational and speech). On the second or third day, the physical therapist said that she had nothing else for me because I had succeeded all expectations.

After waking up, I learned that I had not been expected to live. With all that was going on with me, I was given a 10% chance to make it through. When I woke up (and would not stop talking, apparently), there was talk of months of rehab and maybe me staying at a rehab facility before going home.


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