In my post yesterday, I wrote my review about the second season of Next in Fashion, a Netflix show. I have more to say about it, apparently. It’s been lurking in the back of my mind, waiting to have its day. The further I get from watching it, the more it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I think it’s because they tried so hard to be diverse and to say that everyone is welcomed in the industry when it’s simply not true. It has never been, but I get that it’s nearly impossible to see outside your particular framework.
Or, as is often the case, the people who can see the issues have no power to change or improve the situation. there may be people at the entry level who realize what bullshit it is, but they can’t do anything about it. In addition, there are millions of hungry young people who are eager to be in the industry. They are willing to be exploited and abused. If any one individual isn’t, then they will get pushed out of the industry.
Side note: Another reason I don’t like fashion is because there is s much rigidity in the gender roles. There are men and there are women, and enevr the twain shall meet. On the show, it was considered daring to have clothing that people of any gender could wear. Or making a skirt for a man. I mean, come on. Putting a skirt on a dude is almost quaint at this point.
I was annoyed that in at least one of the briefs there was the edict to make an outfit for a woman and an outfit for a man. Yes, I know, that’s the way the industry has always been. That’s not next in fashion, is it? It’s just a little precious to me that they were saynig they were tyring to find something fashion-forward and daring when they can’t even get out of the binary and get past the fatphobia.
I know it’s asking too much. The industry is steeped with sexism and fatphobia. It’s not going to change any time soon. But, can they at least join us in this millennium? I don’t get the stubborn insistence that they have to design clothing for women who look like 12-year-old boys. Tall 12-year-old boys. No boobs, no hips, no ass. Thighs not touching, and, yeah, I’m going to say it, anorexic. It seems like the guys are getting thinner, too, which was not the direction I wanted this to go in. Equality to me means allowing every the opportunity to expand–literally. It’s really hard for me to have any interest in an industry that is actively telling women they need to be so much less.
I think that’s another reason I had a hard time rooting for Bao on the show. For all her talk about empowering women, all her looks were very restrictive and would only work with a very limited demo of women–until the final episode she was in. Even then, it was more like, oh, ok. Someone who is chunky can wear that, but not someone who is truly fat. Again, it’s not a matter of not being flattering or showing skin. Lizzo has shown that you can be extra-thick and be hot as hell in very little clothes. But, that’s not the only way for a bigger woman to be sexy. As I mentioned, Missy Elliott is fucking hot at any size, and she mostly wore stylish tracksuits and other athleisure wear.
There was an article I read a decade ago or so about the tendency for women to show it all off and call it empowerment. It noted that you can’t really say yes if you’re not able to say no. Meaning, it’s not empowering if you feel you HAVE to show skin any more tahn it’s not empowering to say you can NEVER show skin.
This is what frustrates me beyond belief. I know this is really basic of me, but you know what’s empowering? Being able to wear clothes that you feel good in. You in general and you specifically. I don’t wear a bra even though I have huge honkers. I don’t care if people are aghast at my jiggling. My nipples are covered, and I’m not flashing anyone. I mostly wear t-shirts and shorts in the spring/summer and sweats and sweatshirts in the winter. If I have an occasion or need to look cute, I have a red flowered tunic and flowy black pants that I can wear. Oh, I don’t wear underwear, either. Except when I have my period (which, hopefully, will be completely gone soon).
When I first came out as bi, I went to a weekend conference for Asian queer women. This was back in the, uh, ’90s? Yeah, late ’90s. We were playing the ‘where are you on the femme/butch spectrum’ game. Look. We were very naive back then. Anyway, one of the women looked at me for several long seconds and said, “I don’t know where to place you.” It was one of the best compliments I’d ever gotten in my life. A few years later, a tall stone-cold butch lesbian (who I would have done in a heartbeat) said that I confused her because I had long hair, but I liked sports. Yes, that was gender determinism, but it still felt good to be fucking with people’s ideas of gender.
I would say my energy is androgynous. I’ve always liked that word, even back in the day when it was an epithet. I’ve said many times that Rachel Maddow is my ideal lookswise. Not for me, but for whom I’m attracted to, regardless of gender. It’s funny because I read very feminine because I have hair to my thighs and because I have huge boobs. But, if you don’t see me, you’d think I was a guy from my voice. I get called ‘sir’ on the phone all the time. I am fine with that.
I think my energy is more masculine if I had to put a gender on it–but why should I? I may not resonate with the nonbinary label, but I do think it’s good for making people question gender. There are very few things that truly need to be limited because of genitalia. Clothing isn’t it. At all. There is nothing in the DNA that says someone who is coded male cannot wear a skirt, for example. Whi shouldn’t I wear a tie and suspenders if I want to? I don’t want to, but that’s my decision. Just as I don’t want to wear makeup or a bra. It’s interesting how so many women insist simultaneously that it’s solely their decision to wear both or either, yet also get mad when someone is happy not wearing either.
Any time someone on the Ask A Manager website writes in to ask if she could get away with not putting on makeup or not wearing a bra (or not shaving her pits/legs, for that matter), there is a sizeable majority who really, really, REALLY don’t like it. Oh, they may not say it flat-out, but they always suggest things that are wearing a bra or putting on makeup (or shaving). “Have you considered just eyeliner, mascara, and blush? It only takes five minutes!” “How about a bralet? It’s like not wearing a bra!” You know what takes even less time? Not putting on makeup at all. You know what’s even more like not wearing a bra? NOT. WEARING. A. BRA.
I mean, I don’t think that’s really difficult to understand, but apparently, I am wrong. I will say, I loved that one of the contestants on the show for the Met Gala Red Carpet made a dress with many pockets on it. I think it was Bao? That was funny as hell because women’s clothing never has actual pockets. Not just the sewed shut bullshit ones.
But. I don’t think fashion is ready to be truly forward. No matter how much the show wants t o promote what’s next in fashion, it’s predicated upon a bunch of rigid rules that you cannot break. No fatties. No natural look. Not too much gender-bending. Men and women. No nonbinary, agender, or genderfluid people need apply. But we can’t speak that part out loud so for now, we’ll consider it progress that at least they don’t openly jeer fat people on the show? Cold comfort indeed.