I’m a mass of contradictions. I’m a creative person who is mostly emotional, rather than rational. At least when I first think about things. I’m a right-brain person through and through. However, when I actually think about a situation that needs a solution, I can do that as well. I don’t like to think logically, but I can do it well.
I can do most of things well, honestly. And I shy away form the things I can’t. Badminton, for example. I am really bad at it. I had to play it for the first time when I was in Thailand with my host family. Well, OK, I took a badminton class once, but that was several years before I went to Thailand. They handed me a racket and just expected me to be able to play. Which I could not. I used to play tennis, which is the exact opposite of badminton.
The reason I can do most things well, though, is because I don’t normally do things I suck at. That’s one reason Dark Souls is such an anathema to me. Normally, I would have quit at the Bell Gargs and never looked back again. There was something inside me, though, that made me keep going on. Pride, probably. I hated letting things beat me, so I gritted my teeth and plowed onwards.
It would probably surprise people to know that I’m a rules follower in general. At least in my daily life. Yes, I speed, but who doesn’t? Other that that, though, I don’t break rules just because. I tend to feel that I might as well do what the rules/law says as long as it’s not an impediment to me.
But. There are times when breaking the rules is important. Especially when there are such stupid laws being passed. *Glaring at the Supreme Court*. I believe in the moral law and ethical law rather than simply the legal one. I’m old. I have very little to lose at this point. Look. I already died twice. Might as well spend the rest of my life doing what I think is the right thing. I have enough privilege not to have to worry too much about the consequences–for now.
It’s absolutely unconscionable to me that my niece and nephews have less repro justice than I did at their age. I did not come back from the dead for this!
It’s funny because I’m very much not a rules follower when it comes to what I’m supposed to think and do. I don’t give a shit about societal norms when it comes to marriage and children, for example. I don’t care about makeup or clothes–other than they’re covering my body. I was just chatting in the RKG Discord about how freeing it is to embrace one’s own flaws. It can really take the wind out of someone’s sails if you agree with their derisive assessment of you. It’s because their anger/superiority has nowhere to go.