Let’s talk more about dating. I’ve been maundering about it in the past two posts, and I have more to say. I was listing the things I looked for in a partner. Let’s keep it going.
7. They have to be on the fringe. I’m a freak. I’ve been a freak all my life. I will be a freak for the rest of my life.
Side Note: My mom once exclaimed in frustration that just because something was traditional, it didn’t mean it was bad. Me being the pain in the ass that I can be immediately retorted, “It doesn’t mean it’s good, either.” Yes, I was being a smartass, but I was also stating my truth. I don’t dismiss tradition just because it’s tradition (any longer). I dismiss it because it doesn’t mean anything to me.
I know that it must pain my mother that I am the opposite of her in almost every way possible. I know she thinks it’s a rejection of her. She’s wrong…and she’s right. She’s wrong in that it was not a deliberate rejection of her. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to be her. It was more that I saw how she was and what effect it had on her life–and that was what I didn’t want. That might sound like a distinction without a difference, but it’s there.
I often talk about how I was in my early twenties when I realized that I didn’t want to have kids. I had been raised with the belief that not only was I going to have them, but that it was the most important thing I as a female-shaped person could do on this earth. This wasn’t just my family, by the way. It’s how society was back in the seventies/eighties/nineties (and sadly, still is to a great extent). There were jokes about going to college to get your MRS degree–but it wasn’t really a joke.