When I first started Taiji, my teacher talked about plateaus. Most Americans are not comfortable with no growth because we are very much a ‘do more’ society. You see it at work in that most places of employment push you to move upwards, whether you want to or not. I read about it at Ask A Manager on a regular basis; people who have no desire to move up are seen as no-getters. And, yes, I just made that up. There was a question from someone who wanted to quit that life but was worried as to how she’d be viewed. And how she would view herself if she got a job that wasn’t high-pressured.
This leaks over into other activities, including exercise. Americans are very much no-pain, no-gain. I know people who go all out in their exercise and then get injured and cannot continue to exercise. They are forced to take time off to heal, then hop right back on that treadmill. Then, injury themselves again, rinse, lather, and repeat. By the way, I know it’s lather, rinse, and repeat, but I have bene saying/writing rinse, lather, and repeat for ages and will probably continue to do so because it’s funny.
I have never liked the ‘push yourself until it hurts’ mentality, even when I was participating in it. I knew that it wasn’t healthy to push myself to the extent I did when I was dealing with eating disorders, but that didn’t stop me from doing it. It just made me hate myself more.
When I started Taiji with this teacher, she said bluntly that Taiji was the antithesis of that. ‘No hurry, no worry’ was our motto, which was not easy to embrace. If I can do something at 6 strength, for example, wouldn’t it be better to do it at 10? Not necessarily, as it turned out.
Taiji is known as the lazy person’s martial arts because we believe in using the least amount of energy necessary for the biggest results. This was not an easy adjustment to make. I was down with it in theory because I am a lazy person by nature. Inertia is my friend, and I do not like to exert myself. However, when it comes to physical activity, I have still ingested many of the same messages that others have because they are so prevalent in our society.
Fifteen years into my studies and I still to fight the impulse to go all-out all the time. My teacher and I occasionally fake-spar, and my instinct is to muscle up. I can make myself relax fairly quickly It’s much better than it was when I first started taking classes, and I maintain that it saved me from any major damage when I was in a minor car accident six or so years ago.
The other thing my teacher pointed out to me back in my newbie days was that you couldn’t always be learning at a rapid clip. I am a fast learner, which means that I don’t do well when I don’t grasp something from the start. It’s the legacy of being the smart kid who got severely chastised for fucking up.
I did not have a hard time learning the Solo (Long) Form, but I did not enjoy it. Once I had graduated from learning it (that’s what it’s called once we learn a form), I wanted to put it in the finished file and move on. I did not like it. I wanted as little to do with it as possible, but I wasn’t really done with it.
The second major thing that my teacher said to me that stuck in my brain was that you can’t be learning new things all the times. There will be plateaus because that’s the nature of learning. No, plateaus are not exciting and fun, but they are necessary.
This is a lesson for me. I hate being at a plateau. I hate not feeling as if I’m learning something. But my teacher is right that you can’t be learning something new all the time. I was teaching myself new weapons forms at a clip, which was exhilarating. However, now I’m at the point where I need to take a step back and let it soak in. I’ve noticed some sloppiness in my forms, which means I don’t need to push forward.
It’s time to maintain and refine. In class, we are learning the Solo (Long) Form as it is now. We have finished all of the first section and are nearly done with the second. It has been so good to go ever the Long Form because it’s been ages since I’ve focused on it. I’ve mentioned before that the Long Form has been in flux for quite some time. I was teaching myself the left side of it before the pandemic, and I stopped 2/3rds of the way through the third section because my teacher’s teacher was changing it on the regular. then, the pandemic hit and I was focused on teaching myself as many weapons forms as possible, which meant the Solo Form fell to the wayside.
Relearning and refining the current iteration has helped me with my forms over all. It has shown me where I have gotten sloppy and when I’ve fudged it because I’m not quite sure what is the correct thing to do.
I have put a moratorium on learning new weapons. Right now, I am focused on doing the ones I know as intentionally as possible. I need to go back and watch the videos again so I can correct the mistakes I’m making. Then, when I’m confident that I’ve gotten the forms down mostly correctly, I’m going to teach myself the left sides to the ones I don’t know.
During my private lessons, we’re focusing on the Solo Form as well. By the way, there is also a Solo(Medium) Form and Solo (Short) Form as well (and its offset, the Fast Form), but for now, I’m focusing on the Solo (Long) Form, so if I just say Solo Form, I mean the Long Form.
I’m having a difficult time remembering what is from which Solo Form. I blame it on my brain damage, which, as I’ve noted before, is not widespread, but it does crop up now and again. I’m fine with it. I take more notes than I did before, and my teacher does not mind if I ask the same questions. There are workarounds to the gaps in my memory, for which I’m profoundly grateful. I 100% would make the tradeoff every time (minor memory loss for not dying). If anything, it makes me grateful that I came back in as good a shape as I did. I can say with confidence that I’m better than I ever was.
So. For now I’m on a plateau that I have chosen for myself. I am taking this time to clean up what I already know and make it better than it was before. Much like me! Better that I was before. Refine and maintain–neither of which are dirty words. I’m learning to appreciate the Long Form in a way that I never have, and that’s such a relief.