
Hi, my name is Minna and I’m addicted to Hades. Every time I think I’m done, I get sucked back in. Most of the time, it’s the lore. Oh, consider this whole post spoilers of some sort. In the beginning, spoilers for the very end game. Then, spoilers for techniques and whatnot. In general, spoilers abound.
About a week ago, I realized that I had most of the achievements for Hades. Not surprising, really, given how much I’ve been playing it. Which is roughly 165 hours. You know what’s bizarre to me? I just passed the amount of time I put into Dead Cells (and got nowhere near this far), which was about 150 hours. I just checked. It was 127 hours. Still. It’s 1/5th the amount of time I put into Nuclear Throne. And, let’s not talk about how much I’ve played Binding of Isaac.
Anyway, more lore! I found out that everyone is shagging everyone else in the game. Megaera has slept with Thanatos and Hypnos (brothers!), and it’s heavily implied that she’s slept with Achilles as well. Or maybe it’s just my interpretation. He, by the way, is in love with Patroclus, and I had to reunite them in Elysium. Orpheus and Eurydice, of course, are beloved as well. Side note: Orpheus is very goth in this game with puffy long black hair and black eyeliner. I was Googling him for something (probably how to do the side quest. We all know by now that I have no qualms about Googling how to finish side quests after I have given it the old college try) and I saw a bunch of Reddit threads asking why did they make Orpheus a girl in this game.
Sigh.
How embarrassing, boys. Can we at least pretend we’re part of the 21st century? Guys can have long hair and wear makeup! Although, I wouldn’t be mad if Orpheus was a woman in this game, but that’s not the lore.