Every time there’s a new FromSoft game, I do a dance that I call–well, I don’t call it anything. I just do it quietly and to myself. Well, I bitch about it on social media, but that’s about it. And talk about it with Ian, but that’s really it. It’s the dance of deciding how much I want to read/watch about the game before I play it. Game Informer made Elden Ring its cover story and I took a quick peek at the content. So many spoilers in the titles of the articles! I quickly shut down the tab because I didn’t want to completely spoil myself.
I figure that most of this info is about the beginning of the game. I mean, no one’s going to spoil the last boss in the main storyline. Although, FromSoft was actually cheeky enough to put the last boss on the box cover art for Dark Souls III. They got away with it because he looks like a generic skellie. He’s the amalgamation of all the previous First Flame lighters, including you from the first game.
I already watched tons of coverage from the Closed Network Beta, rationalizing that it was only the very beginning of the game. Journalists were able to spend an entire weekend with it before the CNB and people played anywhere from nine or ten hours to over seventy. I loved watching people play it and wished I could have participated in the CNB myself. I mean, I could have, but it would have been on the PS4, which would not have been enjoyable. Ian told me that they don’t do PC betas because of hackers, and that proved to be wise given the current situation (hackers got into the system and can hijack your computer through the FromSoft online connection). All the FromSoft games are currently offline, which is a pain in the ass. This is why we can’t have nice things, PC gamers! FromSoft has to get it fixed in less than a month because presumably, Elden Ring will be on the same network and one of the things being hyped about it is how easy and fun it’ll be to play with your friends. I know there are people who plan on playing the whole thing in co-op.
Let’s talk about the game proper.
I really don’t get hyped for much of anything. I don’t like movies and TV shows for reasons I’ve explored in the past. This also goes for products as well. My brother and I talked about marketing because we’re both practical types. We buy what is the best product, not what is pushed into our faces. He did succumb to Tesla marketing to a certain extent and upsold himself, but he was going to buy a Tesla, anyway. As for me, there are a few brands I like a great deal, such as Logitech. However, if they were to start sending out shoddy products, I would switch. I used to like Coke Zero when I drank pop. Then, they changed the formula and I hated it. It tasted simultaneously flatter and sweeter. I quit drinking it. So, yeah, I’m loyal as long as you give me what I want. The minute you don’t, I’m out.
It’s the same with popular media. There’s very little that I get excited about. No movies and TV, obviously. I had a hard time when Wonder Woman came out because so many women were hyped about it. I relate more to women than men and I’m always down with a portrayal of a strong woman. However, I don’t care for superhero stuff. At all. When I saw the trailer for Wonder Woman, I sighed internally. So many women lost their shit over it and I was like, “Is that it?” They were swooning over the swordplay, which, I hate to say, isn’t that impressive.
Side Note: The scene where Brienne of Tarth and Arya Stark clank swords–same. I saw the clip and all I could see were the mistakes and how NOT to handle a sword.
I also didn’t like that Steve had such a prominent place in the movie. It’s supposed to be about Diana Pierce and he just could not shut the fuck up. Was that his name? I’m going to pretend it is, even if it isn’t. The trailer left me cold and I just could not get into it. The same with the trailer for Crazy Rich Asians. Representation is great! But it doesn’t represent me. Which I’m fine with, but I hate it sometimes that I look at things so differently. I still haven’t seen Wonder Woman.
Here’s the thing. Anything that has to do with weapons, I’m going to have a different point of view. There are a few female YouTubers/game journalists who are into weapons. It’s very much in the ‘they’re so cool’ kind of way, which is fine, but one of them does a quick pull of the sword from the sheath when requested by her subs. It makes me wince every time I see it because it’s so unsafe.
Back to brand loyalty. FromSoft is one ‘brand’ I’m rabidly loyal to. Any game they put out, I’m buying (except if it’s on PSVR, sadly). However, and I’ve spilled much ink on this, I feel like I’m reaching the limits of my ability to fromSoft. At least in games like Sekiro where I can’t cobble together my own way of beating the game. It’s funny because my lasting impression of Sekiro is negative. Or rather, my lasting impression is that it’s a fantastic game that is not for me. I was so drained by the end of the game, which is not unusual for me. I felt that way at the end of every game, but it faded in time. Not with Sekiro. Every time I go back to it, something in me says, “Nope.” I have tried so hard to master the deflect to no avail. I am in NG+ up to Father (Owl) again (which I would need for one ending, and I just cannot do it. Not to mention Demon of Hatred and, of course, Isshin the Sword Saint. Even if I savescummed, I’d still have to fight him once. Not to mention the other form of him and Emma in the bad ending path. Could I do it? Probably. Do I want to do it? Most definitely not. That’s the difference. With the Souls games, even when I didn’t get a boss first try on my own, I knew I could get them eventually on my own. Except for Midir and Sister Friede. I had my doubts about those two all the way through. With Midir it’s not even that he’s hard per se. He’s just so damn tanky. His health pool is a lot and his damage is so deadly whereas your damage against him is minimal. As for Sister Friede, she’s just three rounds of pure hell.
Here’s another reason I want BB to come to PC. I summoned for three of the five bosses in the DLC. The DLC is fucking brutal and I was worn out by the time I reached it. What I should have done was stopped playing after I made it to the final boss (you can’t beat him or you’ll go into NG+ automatically) and taken a break before going into the DLC. That’s not how I play, however, and I gulped it all down at once. The DLC itself is hard as fuck and I was tired by the time I beat Lady Maria. Also beat the Living Failures on my own as well, but that’s not much to brag about. I was pleased by the way I beat Lady Maria. I used the Executioner’s Gloves and tentacles to the face, but in different phases. Apparently I used the Tonitrus on her as well, though I’m not sure my rationale for that as she’s not kin. Probably because it’s quick for the first phase of the fight rather than my slow, heavy Hunter Axe, though I used the latter for the second and third phases. Beats me!
I’m looking forward to Elden Ring, obviously, but I’m also nervous as fuck about how hard it’ll be. We shall soon see.