Underneath my yellow skin

Tag Archives: minority view

If I were monarch, part two

In the last post, I was musing about what my ideal world would look like. Of  course, it’s difficult to say because I can’t account for every issue that we would come up against, but I did mention a few of the bigger ones. Racism, sexism, queerphobia, classism, and ableism. Of course, there are more than just those (religious intolerance and ageism spring to mind), which proves my point that you really can’t fix everything. In fact, even if all these issues were to suddenly disappear, others would spring up in their place. Why? Because human beings love to categorize and to belong to a team. In order to be part of a team, you have to have someone(s) who are not on the team.

Here’s the thing. It’s fine and dandy to say that in my diversity town (instead of my ideal world) it would be cishet white dudes who would go through the experience in order to learn. The problem is that assumes that if someone is a minority in one area, then they would be sympathetic to other minorities.

This is most emphatically not true.

You would think I would have known this ages ago, but I foolishly assumed the best of people back when I was in my twenties and thirties. In fact, when I was in college, I had a friend who was adamant that I was an optimist. I was so offended because I was a cynical pessimist, damn it. He listened to me rant for a good five minutes before calmly saying, “You expect people to do the right thing and then are disappointed when they don’t. That makes you an optimist.”

I opened my mouth to argue, but then I closed it again. He was right. I did expect people to do/say the right thing. I was disappointed when that didn’t pan out. In other words, I was an optimist. Damn it. I was cynical because I kept getting my expectations dashed.

Side note: The reason I started thinking about all this is because I was getting frustrated in the RKG Discord when a few people would not acknowledge that Sekiro was not for everyone. Though no one would be so mean as to say ‘git gud’, it pretty much is that sentiment.

It’s fascinating as well as frustrating to see people (let’s face it. Mostly cishet white dudes) not be able to see that they are not the norm. And, to be fair, in this case, the Discord was built around From games (loosely), so many of the people who are in the Discord are From fans. I am, too, but I am not good at them. And I am one of the few people who can recognize that.


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What a wonderful (ideal) world

In dreaming up my diversity town, I got to thinking about how I would want the world to be in general. If I were made the monarch of the world, I mean. I would rule with an iron fist in a velvet glove or a velvet fist in an iron glove….Probably the former. I’m talking about pie-in-the-sky, it will never happen ideal.

So. As is my wont, I decided t o write a post and figure it out as I write. This is not specific to the diversity town I’ve been talking about in my previous posts, but more how I would like the world to be in general.

One. No labels. Not in the smarmy “I don’t see color” way, but in the “I don’t want to limit people” way. Labels are fine as long as they serve their purpose–which is providing a handy heuristic for something more complicated and complex. For example, yes, I’m Taiwanese American. That’s an accurate label, but it doesn’t tell the whole story. A label never can.

The problem is that often, people think the label is the end of the discussion and not just the beginning. What I mean is that, yes, I’m Taiwanese American. But that only tells you a sliver about who I am. I would have to explain to you my family dysfunction, my father’s rampant nationalism, the negative experiences I’ve had in Taiwan, and growing up Asian in a very white Minnesota suburb in the eighties in order for you too have a better understanding  of that piece of me.

In general, I am not a fan of labels. Again, not in a snotty ‘no labels’ way that some people use it to avoid taking ownership of their political position. Ahem. That’s a pet peeve of mine, but it’s not my focus. I want to say that I mean it that labels should not be constraining, and I often find them to be just that.

Let’s take another example. Bi/bisexual. This was something I chose when I was in my early twenties–when I first realized that I was attracted to more than just men. I explored other terms such as omnisexual and pansexual. I didn’t like them. At all. They sounded (to me) pretentious and pompous. I didn’t like bisexual, though, because it felt limiting. But I decided it was the least-worst of the choices and went with it.


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