My brother and I were talking about his journey into dating apps land. I set up my OkCupid profile out of curiosity and immediately shut down. It made me panic because there was just too much stuff to look over. And they were pinging me with notifications that didn’t matter. I don’t like not being in control of what I see, which is an issue of mine. In addition, the first woman confused me because she was married, straight, and looking for friends with benefits. Presumably, only men, so why did she show up for me?
The algorithms don’t like me. I’m a freak and I break all the boundaries, and as open as the profile is, they still don’t like it when the person doesn’t go down a prescribed path. I left it open to pretty much anything other than just friends and maybe a few other constraints. It did not like it, and I did not like the app. I prefer Bumble because it’s much smaller and with less choices.
Anyway, my brother called me yesterday, nervous and excited because a woman he thought was way out of his league (but swiped right on, anyway), matched with him. I was tickled to see him so excited, like a kid in a candy shop. And, I must admit, it was fun to see and hear him so nervous as he’s usually very cool under pressure.
I did tell him that she was just a person like he was. I don’t really believe in leagues or being out of them, but I understand feeling someone is out of reach. However, she is just a person with flaws and assets like the rest of us, no matter how attractive she is. Plus, he doesn’t know her so it’s her personality might not match his at all. Or her smell. Or anything else.
I didn’t want to dampen his enthusiasm too much, so I let him be free to feel the butterflies. He hasn’t dated in nearly three decades and it’s pretty endearing to see him nervous about it.
I will say, though, that we got into a bit of a tiff because he only likes skinny women with no boobs, the slightest bit of hips, and no ass. He doesn’t like them to wear makeup, either. He’s very frank about this, and it’s just grating to hear at times. I’m fat. But more than that, I have huge boobs and now have an ass as well. To hear him repeatedly talk about how not attractive he finds even normal weight women, well, it’s not great for the ego. So I was a bit sharp when he said for the umpteenth time that some normal-weight woman was too heavy for him. He called her overweight; she wasn’t.