Underneath my yellow skin

Tag Archives: comfort gaming

Mental health and video games

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There is a concept in video gaming called comfort gaming. It’s pretty easy to figure out what it means–games that soothe you as you play. Well, not exactly. I mean, it can be that, but it could also just be a game that you can play without thinking. Johnny Chiodini mentions it in their series when they were with Eurogamer, Low Batteries. They call that game they play when feeling down a sadgame.

They emphasize that the game itself does not have to be sad. It’s just a game they gravitate towards when they feel sad. Yesterday, I stumbled over a much more recent video in which they participated with their old workplace (Eurogamer) about how video games helped with mental health issues. I have included that video below.

For me, it’s FromSoft games. For the longest time, it was Dark Souls III. It’s my favorite game of all time, though Elden Ring has essentially moved itself into a tie. Oftentimes, I flummoxe people by saying cheerfully that I know it’s not the best Dark Souls game, but it’s my favorite. By the way, I love being contrary like that. I mean it, though. And interestingly, I’ve had people say it actually is the best Dark Souls game overall.

I guess it’s depends on what you mean by ‘best’. I’m talking specifically of the three Dark Souls games. The first is considered a game-changer, the second is the ignored stepchild, and the third is the greatest hit album. In other words, the first was seen as a breath of fresh air and mind-bending (if you ignored Demon’s Souls) that ultimately ran out of time to be truly great.

The sequel was a disappointment to most people, but I have a fondness for it. It tried to do some things differently in order to differentiate it from the original. Did it work? Not completely. But it tried. And I have to give it credit for that. In addition, if it didn’t have ‘Dark Souls‘ in its name, I think it would have been much better received.

As for the third game, it was the most polished of the three. Plus, it took the best from the first two games and seamlessly blended it together. I’ve called it the ‘best of’ hits album by a group that has been together for twenty years. It has all the hits that the fans love and maybe one or two new originalsongs. Some people think it’s the hardest, which is probably true objectively. But because I had played both of the other games twice in the lead up to the release of this game, it felt like coming home.

I think that’s the reason it’s my favorite, by the way. That and because it’s the first From game I played in real time. Meaning as soon as it was released. Ian bought the season pass for me when it came out, and I got to be in on the discoveries this time around. I hadn’t played either of the previous games until years after they were released. Now, FromSoft games are one of the few I will buy as soon as I can. I know I will at least try to play a From game (I gave up fairly quickly on Armored Core VI Fires of Rubicon).


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The year in gaming

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At the end of every year, I do a year in games review before handing out funny awards to games I’ve played over the year. The running gag is that a FromSoft game wins every year for game of the year, even in a year when a From game isn’t released (which isn’t many years).

This year, however, I don’t feel much need for that. Why? One, I did not play many games this year. Not many new games, that is. Two ,the ones I did, for the most part, did not captivate me. There is one glaring exception, but I won’t be talking about that in this post. Probably.

There were games I played that were just continued from last year. Dorfromantik by Toukana Interactive. Binding of Isaac: Rebirth (yes, I know it’s Repentance now and that’s what I’m actuallly playing, but, ugh. I really think the game peaked at Rebirth) by Edmund McMillan, and Cozy Grove by Spry Fox. The last came out with DLC in April which I did not pick up until late October. It’s more of the same with some fairly big bugs (and not the kind you catch with your critter net), and I could have taken or left it. Except for one thing. My absolute favorite character in the whole game came with the DLC. She’s an introverted, anxious, low self-esteem writer/science person who makes origami to soothe herself and I love her. She broke my heart with her story and I just want to wrap her in a comfy duvet and make her tea.

In general, though, it’s just more of the same. My island is stressing me out because you have to constantly feed the different animals, and it shows what they want above their heads. I know you don’t HAVE to feed them, but it’s ugly to have their wants broadcast in that way.

Before I started playing the DLC, I was excited for the announcement of Cozy Grove 2. It’s coming out next year sometime, I think in the first quarter. Is it just going to be more of the same?If so, then I may pass on it. I think I have hit my limit on the game.

To be clear, I love the concept of helping ‘stuck’ bears to the other side. I adore their stories and helping them do the last thing they need to do before moving on. The stories are varied, and one is truly shocking.

I have to say, though, the negatives of the DLC really turned me off. One of them was the persistent bug with the collector’s request to find the piece of the puzzle and finish the puzzle. It’s a take on a puzzle in the original game.

The finst time it came up, I found the puzzle piece, but not the puzzle. I looked in the Discord and it said the puzzle should have been near the puzzle piece like the other puzzle. It wasn’t. I could not find the puzzle anywhere on the island. Anywhere. I went over the island several times. I. Could. Not. Find. It. Anywhere. I satrted the game again. I tried to put it in a save slot and start it from there. It was not to be found.

So. After several days, I decided I’d do the very tedious job of moving everything movable (all the decor) and do a pixel hunt. My absolutely favorite part of adventure games bar none–hunting pixel by pixel for something. That’s obvious sarcasm, if you can’t tell.

I have played this game for nearly a year. I have bought many many things. Many. Placed them around my island. I barely have a square inch of space on my island. So, having to bundle them up and move them around was a pain in the ass. A huge pain. And this was supposed to be fun!


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I don’t think I actually like video games

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I came to a realization a few weeks ago that I may not actually like video games. Hear me out. I’ve been playing ‘hardcore’ games for roughly seven years. The first one was Torchlight, which I absolutely loved. I loved the protagonist who looked Asian if you squinted. I really loved that she came back as a voiced NPC in the sequel, and her voice was low and husky like mine. I loved that I could have a pet whom I could name and feed fish. The game was very addictive, and I immediately had the ‘just one more level’ feeling about it.

Diablo III was right after that, and I really dug that as well. Then the Borderlands, original and sequel, which I played for hundreds of hours. Then, I played Dark Souls, and everything changed. I could no longer play hack ‘n slashes afterwards because the combat was empty and unsatisfying. Yes, I played Skyrim afterwards and enjoyed it*, but I was a caster (of course), so I didn’t have to do much of the melee combat.

In all this time, I played dozens of games that I didn’t like. At all. Some that I really wanted to like and should have been up my alley, such as Alan Wake, and others that I just didn’t like at all. Like Arkham whatever. I’m not sure which game, but I hated the combat. I gave it a fair shake–a few hours–but I just didn’t click with it at all. Others, I liked, but there was one aspect that I just couldn’t stand that made me fall off it, such as Sleeping Dogs, which I call Sleepy Dawgs for reasons that should be obvious. I really liked it, not in a small part because of the badass Asian male protagonist, but the driving suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks. I can’t emphasize that enough. I didn’t love the combat as it’s similar to the Batman combat, but I could hack that. It was the driving that I haaaaaaaaaaated. I distinctly remember the incident that made me quit. I had to follow a wedding cake truck (long boring story) to get the cake back. After failing it twice, I was DONE. When I went back to try it again much later, I accidentally erased my saved game because United Front Games, the devs, made the inexplicable decision to put New Game at the top of the queue rather than Load Game like everyone else, and there are no saved files in the game–at least when I played. That was it for me. No way I was playing the game again, and I have not.


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Going back to my comfort gaming–Dark Souls III

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back into the groove.
Fire to the face, Iudex!

I did it. I reinstalled Dark Souls III on my laptop. When I’m sick and exhausted, I can’t play a new game. I don’t have the bandwidth to figure things out, especially as I tend to like so-called difficult games. I know it’s a funny thing to say, but Dark Souls games are comfort food for me, and, yes, I mean specifically Dark Souls and not Bloodborne or Sekiro. Although, I will say the latter was pretty easygoing until the end game, but it’s not the same as Dark Souls.

I’m going to say something rather controversial in the Souls community, but I don’t give a fuck, obviously. Dark Souls III is my favorite of the Souls games to play*, and I’ve beaten it probably twenty times. Because I’m tired, depressed, and weary, I’m taking the road most traveled–being a Pyro. Then, adding strength later on so I can wield my beloved Lorian’s Greatsword.

How’s it going? Kinda rough, I gotta say. The buttons are similar, but just different enough to mess me up. Iudex Gundyr, the tutorial boss, has never given me a problem as a Pyro. He’s weak to fire, especially in his second phase, and I can finish him off without even getting close. However. A (Xbox One) is jump in Sekiro, and it’s really fucking important to use it in combat. B is dodge step, and it’s ostensibly usable in combat, but not really. I used it minimally, and I used A every fight. On the other hand, A in Souls is pick up an item, talk to someone, etc, which, obviously, has no use in a fight. B is roll, which is god in Souls. So, Iudex was coming for me in his abyss-y, snaky form, and I pressed A and did–nothing. I frantically pressed it several times until I died.

That’s been my biggest problem so far. I’m up to the Road of Sacrifices, and I’ve died…six times I think. Once to Iudex (embarrassing) and once because I forgot jump is to click in the left thumbstick, which is just bad mapping and once because my cheese for the Darkwraith at the bottom of the elevator (make him fall into the elevator maw) didn’t work the first time. One of my problems with not dying as much in this game is that there is a mechanic that is built upon dying. There is a PC, Yoel of Londor, who offers to ‘Draw Out True Strength’–which is free levels. Of course, nothing is free in a Dark Souls game, and you get the hollowing curse from Yoel.

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