Underneath my yellow skin

Tag Archives: exhausted

I’m Sick; Get Off My Lawn!

I’m still sick. I learned from my taiji teacher that her husband has a mold allergy that has symptoms which mimics flu symptoms. Fever, chills, body aches, exhaustion. It also produces itchy eyes, which I’ve been having in the past few days. I had no idea a mold allergy could be something that happens outside versus inside and that it can be like the flu. She suggested Flonase or the generic equivalent, so I’ll give that a shot the next time I go to Cubs. I’m really not in the mood to blog as I’m feverish, cranky, and tired. So, here’s a video of Max White (don’t know who he is, but there’s no commentary in the video) doing a Waste of Skin Bloodborne run, all bosses. That means no leveling up at all during the game. It’s pretty hardcore, so major props.

It’s All in My Head (and Bloodborne)

I’m sick. Again. I’m also depressed about it because it seems to be a yearly thing. I got sick around this time last year, and it lasted on and off for the next four or so months. Rightly or wrongly, I blamed going to the doctor on my further illnesses as I went twice and got sick again immediately after. This time, however, I have not been to the doctor, and I feel like shit. I’m alternating hot and cold, and I’m exhausted no matter how much or how little I sleep. I had to skip Master Choi’s seminar this weekend because I didn’t want to get anyone else sick, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to make it through the two hours (plus half an hour driving either way). Shadow has been my little nurse, lying on my legs to keep them warm. The trade-off is that he gets in my face (literally) as I’m waking up because I’ve been a bit remiss in getting him his breakfast on time.

It’s stressful to get tired over every little thing. I have pared down my morning taiji routine because I’m sick, and I’m still spent by the time I’m done with it. Driving to the grocery store and picking up a few items exhausts me beyond my resources, and it’s hard not to feel resentful by the time I get home because I feel as if my body is betraying me. Going to the grocery store shouldn’t be any big deal, and yet, in my current state, it’s such a production. I’m lying on the couch with Shadow on my legs, thinking I need to go to the store, but having no energy or motivation. It takes me about a half hour just to drag myself off the couch, then fifteen minutes to actually make it out the door. By the time I get home, I’m ready to drop. Things that normally take such little thought now take every last bit of reserve I have.

Right now, I’m sitting on my couch with a cup of coffee and Shadow on my legs. I’m so freaking hot, it’s uncomfortable. But, if I take off my sweatshirt, I’ll be chilled in a minute. I’m someone who rarely gets cold, so getting the chills is really uncomfortable for me. I will say the older I get, the less I’m able to tolerate intense cold. I used to drive with my windows down well into the sub-zero degrees range. Now, I shut the windows around zero degrees and feel sheepish about it. It’s hard to adjust to aging, and I’m not doing it very gracefully. I have freckles and moles that suddenly appeared after I turned forty, and whoever said acne is only a teenager thing was lying through their teeth.

Shadow has now hopped up on the top of the couch in his usual spot because he’s decided he’s done enough administering to me. He might also not want to be too close to the germs, for which I don’t blame him. This is me right now:

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One of the weird things about recovering from being sick is that my sleep gets really weird*. One of the only things I like about being sick is that I can get a solid chunk of sleep without much effort. Granted, I’m still fucking tired when I wake up, but at least I get some rest. Ironically, I know I’m getting better when my sleep starts to get worse. As I’ve said before, it’s as if my mind/body will only allow me to get good sleep when it has an excuse–me being sick. The second I start getting better, my sleep takes a nose dive. As a result, I may feel physically better, but I’m just as exhausted. That’s where I am right now. Exhausted and crankier than hell.

My favorite video for the week: BBC interview interrupted by the interviewee’s daughter who walks into the place like she owns it.

Predictably, several memes around this family have emerged. My favorite tweets:

is pretty great, only to be equaled by:

I love this little girl so hard and tweeted that I wish I had a tenth of her confidence and sense of style. I also said of the latter tweet that this pairing should be True Detectives, Season 3: Who stole all the rainbows in DC?

BBC interview girl is the best, and I hope to be just like her when I grow up.


*Weirder than usual, which is pretty damn weird.