I’m back, back again. More end game of Elden Ring. Yesterday, I wrote about *SPOILERS FOR THE END GAME* my least-favorite part of the game, Miquella’s Haligtree which has supposedly the hardest boss in the game, Malenia, Blade of Miquella.
By the way, the lore in this is much more straightforward, but also more complex than it is in other From games. That’s probably the George RR Martin influence. It’s very Game of Thrones-y in nature.
So. Malenia and Miquella are twins. Miquella is eternally young, almost a child. Their parents are Radagon and Marika (who are the same entity, but that’s something entirely different). There are another set of twins, Morgott and Mohg, the Fell Omens. Their parents are Marika and Goddfrey/Hoarah Loux. Mohg takes Miquella as his, ah, consort (kind of), which is the influence of GRRM, it is felt.
Anyway. Malenia has protected her brother from the very first, and that’s why she fights you when you come into her boss room. Or something. She’s an amazing boss. she’s stunning to look at and the beginning of her second phase will just give you chills. She becomes the Goddess of Rot, and she is terrifying in her beauty. She’s also naked and has wings.
I have not had problems with her, but I’ve only fought her twice. The first time was in NG on my faith-based character. I used Swarm of Flies, the Mimic Tear, and walked backwards. I didn’t come within five miles of her lethal combos. See, if she hits you, she gets health back. Even, apparently, if you block her, she gets some back. Or maybe it’s only if you don’t have a hundred percent block shield.
Anyway, I had girded my loins to fight her because I had heard how difficult she was. I beat her in fifteen or so real tries, and I was like, “That’s it?” But, again, I didn’t have to get close to her, so that mitigated a lot of the challenge. Still. I was quite proud of myself and left her alone for the rest of my runs. Until the end of NG+ (after I got the plat, much later. Like two days ago later). I was at her boss door, and I thought, why not? I summoned two humans and got her on the second try. As I mentioned yesterday, the first time, one person peaced out at the end of the first phase and then the other person did as well. I’ve had this happen to me quite a lot in the end game. No idea why. My unkind thought is that they want to fuck with me (not me specifically, but anyone summoning) just to make the boss harder.
My more kind thought is that they are running out of pots and don’t want to grind it through in the second phase, the first person, I mean, and then the second person doesn’t want to deal with the jacked up boss with just me. Either way, though, it’s annoying as fuck. I let Malenia kill me so I could summon again, making sure not to get the same people.
On the second go, it was smooth until late in the second phase. I got cocky and decided to see if I could Wolf’s Assault her. She came at me and sliced me until I only had the magic pixel. How rare was it that the magic pixel was on my side! I hurriedly healed as my summons took care of Malenia. We got her in short order, and I got 750,000 Runes! I’m still amazed at that. That’s only 2 levels, but still! I made it to a million, and I’m considering going further with it.
I hate the whole area. I raced through it this time because i just could not be bothered. They have the grotesque centipedes/prawns from Caelid. They have souped up Leyndell soldiers. They have the worst enemy in the game, the Royal Revenant from Liurnia of the Lakes. There are Erdtree Avatars as regular bosses as well as the Crystalians, who are the worst. Leonine shows up as de the rest of his merry Misbegotten kin. Plus the astonishingly tough little grunts who can push you for half your health bar.
And to get to this part is hell and a half as well. I know I recounted a lot of this is the last post, but I just had to reiterate how terrible this area is. And the thing is, it’s all just so you can fight Malenia. Why not just put her in the Mountaintops of the Giants? Or Crumbling Farum Azula?
I know From loves to have a skill check, but it’s usually not so late in the game. I said yesterday and I’ll say it again. This area is just trash. I don’t think they put much thought into it, which is so unlike them. Especially with Miyazaki at the helm. Normally, he has exquisite levels that are a marvel. This one is like he had ChatBot AI do it for him. “Oh, let’s put Leonine here with his buddies. Then, over here, we’ll throw in a bunch of the tough scrubs from, ah, that earlier area. Over here, shit, let’s put the bubble people from the capital. Then, of course, we must throw in that asshole who flails all his limbs and transports from place to place, spitting poison at you as it goes.”
Oh, and of course, her Clean Rot Knights who are absolute nightmares. It’s not elegant. It’s not beautiful. It’s just throwing all the shit in the pot and stirring it up. Then tossing it on you so you can feel sticky and gross. Yeah! That’s exactly what you want this late in the game.
I have spent two posts complaining about this area, but that’s because it’s such a disappointment for the centerpiece boss of the game. She deserved better than to have this shit show of an area as her level. This area in and of itself is enough for me to say it’s not the game is not a 10. It’s that bad an area. I am actually shocked at how bad it is. I watched a video on the area in which they pointed out there was no new enemy, and it really clicked inside me.
This is a throwaway area, and that is unacceptable this late in the game. It’s inexcusable, and what’s worse, it’s not necsesary. I was nearly 200 hours into the game at this point. I was more than satisfied with my expreience. I would have actually given a higher rating if this area wasn’t in the game and Malenia was somewhere else. And Loretta. I love her. I felt she was done hard by being put in this area. And why? It doesn’t really make sense. I mean, if she is a knight of the Carian Manor, then why is she actually Malenia’s knight? There might be a good reason for this, but it doesn’t really make sense in the lore as I understand it.
Dang. I was going to get to the last area of the game, Crumbling Farum Azula (well, the last entriely new area), but I got sidetracked by how horrible Miquella’s Haligtree is. See you back here tomorrow!