Here’s the thing about being weird. Yes, I’m doing a cold open. Here was the last post about me being weird if you want to catch up. I think this is four? Something like that.
I don’t want to be normal, whatever that means.
Side note: (Yes, this early!) I was complaining to K several decades ago about how I was such a weirdo and didn’t want the normal life. I was complaining in the context of how I wished I could be normal and not such a freak. She said, and I’m paraphrasing, “But Minna, you don’t want to be married and have kids. You don’t want to do any of those things. You would be miserable.”
She is right. I don’t want any of that. None of it sounds appealing to me, and I realized that what I wanted was a sense of belonging–not the actual markers of being ‘normal’. I want to be able to be me, more or less, and not have to explain my thought process all the goddamn time.
Side note II: I love the word heuristics. I love the idea of a heuristic. We can’t function without heuristics because it’s impossible to analyze everything every moment of the day. For example, when you reach a stoplight, it would be difficult if you didn’t know that red means stop, yellow means caution, and green means go. If you had to figure that out every time you reached a stoplight, you would not be able to drive.
That’s a silly example, but it’s an easy one for people to understand. Heuristics extend to societal norms. We greet each other warmly when we meet, and we are civil unless we’re given a reason not to be. Societal norms dictate our interactions. Again, I’m not saying we should get rid of them all. What I am saying is that they shouldn’t be so rigid that people who aren’t a part of them can’t fit in at all.
Unfortunately, it’s very common for a group to close ranks. I am a lifelong Democrat, but that doesn’t mean that I approve of everything they say and do. This is my issue with groups in general–it’s too easy for the rules to become calcified. And for them to quickly close ranks. This is my issue with the weird epithet being hurled at Trump and Vance by Harris and Walz. It’s drawing a line I’m not comfortable with. I get that it’s signalling who’s in and who’s out–but it doesn’t do anything to make me feel like I’m in.
The probem with talking about ‘normal average Americans’ is that I’m not one and have never been. I’m on the fringe of the fringe, and it’s not even close. I’m weird, and I feel alienated by people in my party who are denigrating the weirdos.
Even thougrh they don’t mean me, they are still talking about me. I don’t do any of the ‘normal’ things that they reassure skeptical people that we Democrats do. When they talk about the future for our children and grandchildren, they are not talking about me. I care about the next generation, of course, but I don’t have children and that’s by choice. I don’t give a shit about hunting and fishing, and I have fallen off sports for reasons I’m not going to get into now. I don’t like movies and TV, and I’m not much into music. I don’t work in an office, either. There are not really many points of interest I have that intersect with people in general.
Add to that the fact that I’m gf/df, allergic to almost everything under the sun, I hate summer, and a bunch of other things that put me in the weirdo camp. It’s no wonder that I’m not considered part of polite society.
I’m excited to vote for Harris/Walz. However, I don’t feel included. I’m used to that as the only time I actually felt a candidate cared about me was Obama. Again, I want to emphasize that I get why the Dems are focusing on being the real Americans. Let’s face it. Republicans have been saying the same thing about Dems for decades. It’s usually more ‘limosuine liberals’ than weird, but it’s the same thing. It’s how out of touch with the ‘normal American’ the Dems are, which is such utter horseshit.
That’s why I understand sticking with the weird tactic in return. Tim Walz is about as Midwest American as you can get. He hunts and fishes, drinks beer and roots for the Vikings. He was a teacher in rural Minnesota for a decade and while doing that, was also a coach for the football team (and took them to the championship). He also started the gay-straight alliance when a teen came to him and said he (the teen) was gay and needed support. Walz knew that a GSA would need a guy like him to champion it in order to work in rural Minnesota in the late 1990s.
He’s married and has two children. I’m sure he attends church. He does. Lutheran (not surprising in Minnesota). He was an NRA enthusiast, but has recently turned his back on them. I’m sure he’s been ice-fishing before because that’s something Minnesotans do. He’s probably been to more tater tot hot dish potlucks than I can count on two hands and two feet. The Republicans tried to paint Walz as a San Francisco elite-wannabe, which was hilariously ironic given that the first time he went to San Francisco was when Harris chose him as one of her top picks for VP. As someone pointed out, Vance lived in SF for a few years as a venture capitalist, on the bankroll of Peter Thiel. Talk about an elite!
I am hopeful about the Democratic Party for the first time since Obama. Even if we lose in November (which, by the way, how??? How is Trump this close? It says some really dark things about half of the people who are voting, and it’s making me unhappy about my country in general), we have a bench that isn’t as sparse as I thought it was.
Also, I need to give a shoutout to President Biden for doing the right thing and stepping down. I’ll write more tomorrow.