Love stinks. At least, that was my motto until roughly a year ago. On and off. When I was a teenager before I got my first date, I desperately wanted it. It was the only thing on my mind and I cringed at how desperate I was. Unrequited crushes that never hid and other assorted… Continue Reading
One of the way allies are encouraged to be supportive of trans/nonbinary people is by putting their pronouns in their email sigs. I’ve seen this subject come up from time to time on Ask a Manager. Almost every time, nonbinary folk and trans folk point out that it’s not helpful to people who aren’t out… Continue Reading
Many moons ago, my brother and I had a discussion about how we Google. Hey, we talk about a lot of things that are on our minds, not necessarily anything deep and insightful. We are very different people, which means we Google in completely opposite ways. Or at least did at the time of this… Continue Reading
Five months after the worst and wildest night of my life, I’m sitting on my couch, contemplating my navel–and the rest of my life. One thing I’m thinking about is dating. About a dozen years ago, I gave up on dating because I had just gotten out of a horrible relationship that I had rushed… Continue Reading
I was reading my stories (advice columns) and one question came up about going to a Finnish spa (in Finland) with your coworkers (if you’re American). One thing that struck me was that it was divided by gender. We can see the problems with that, yes? Especially now that we are more aware of the… Continue Reading
I’ve really been feeling myself lately. As I wrote in a recent post, I’m cute as fuck! Which is nothing notable, except I spent all of my life before going into the hospital either absolutely hating myself and thinking I was grotesque and ugly to determinedly neutral (but not really neutral) about it. I was… Continue Reading
One thing about my medical experience is that it really separated the wheat from the chaff. What I mean is that many of the things I was anxious about in the Before (hospital) Times, simply do not matter any longer. It’s hard to talk about it without seeming condescending or as if I’m glossing over… Continue Reading
A few hours after this post goes up, it’ll be the five-month anniversary of my medical trauma. That’s astonishing to me because I didn’t think I’d make it past the third month, but not for health reasons. Healthwise, I’m lucky that I haven’t taken any sustained damage. I have been checked out and given a… Continue Reading
For most of my life, I’ve defined myself mostly by what I am not. I am not normal. I am not like other people. I am not feminine in that I don’t care about fashion, hair, or makeup. Though since the hospital, I’ve been having more fun with my hair. I did it in Chun-Li… Continue Reading
I talked in my last post about two letters I’d read in Care & Feeding (Slate), one right after the other. They had to do with highly sensitive people and how parents/grandparents reacted to them. The third and fourth letters were about gender identity and closely related. The third letter is from a mom grieving… Continue Reading