Underneath my yellow skin

Category Archives: Social Justice

There are no rails any longer

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So. Trump talked of deescalation. I kknew better, but I felt a glimmer of hope that maybe he would do something that appeared to be deescalating. While I personally was gleeful about Bovino leaving (because I loathe him so much), I knew it was not going to make that much of a difference.

I was not wrong. Homan came in talking the same shit, though he wrapped it up in slightly less grotesque language (though still awful). And yet, they are pushing hard, still. Not only were Don Lemon and another journalist, Georgia Forte arrested for reporting on a protest of a local church (and two others were arrested as well), but the ICE raids are still going strong.

Today was another general strike day accross the country. Content creators are fundraising for local immigration rapid response teams as well. The exhaustion is bone-deep. There are some white liberals who say that we cannot afford/that it’s a luxury to be exhausted/fearful. They are not wrong, but they are also not right.

We have to do what we can, yes, but for some of us, that takes more effort than others. And some of us are closer to the danger than others.

Here’s the thing. Is this different than anything we’ve seen before? The brazen lawlessness is. But. The acts of violence against US citizens? No, that is not new. It’s just that it’s been easy for most Americans to ignore because 1. the vast majority of the people being acted upon have been black and brown; and 2. they didn’t literally see it with their eyes.

I have written a ton about how the ease with which people can videotape on their phones these days makes it harder to lie about what the feds are doing.  Lord knows, they keep trying, but most people are not swayed by their lies.

And yet, for every inch of progress it looks like we’ve made gets immediately drowned out by the hundred other nasty, illegal things this federal administration has done and continues to do. In the video I included below, Ta-Nehisi Coates says (I’m paraphrasing a bit, and I think he was quoting Russ Feingold): Against someone who is just determined to become a tyrant….you can’t really design a system that is foolproof.

It’s something I’ve talked about ad nauseam with friends. Our system is far less than perfect, and we’ve had growing pains in our entire existence. However, at the very least, we could believe that the president wanted what was best for the country. No matter how inept and horrible that vision was; it was sincere.


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Jerking that cirrcle harder, part two

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We’re in a holding pattern right now. The border ‘czar’ (god, I hate the use of that term in government. We’re not supposed to have kings of any sort, and that smacks of kingdom to me. It also amuses me in a sardonic way that his name in Homan. Like he misspelled human. RKG (a YouTube content creator I watch) has a longstanding joke for when they play Resi games. They make the spiders say, “I aM hOomAn” in a robotic voice, and that’s what Tom Homan’s name reminds me of.

Anyway. The border guy is here and talking about how the agents have been in ‘theater’ for eight months. Uh, that’s war talk. Is he admitting that the ICE agents and Border Patrol are at war with Minnesotans?

As joyous as I am that Bovino is out, I know it’s just a cosmetic change. This new guy may placate the locals for a few days, but then it’s going to be business as usual. Or they may be quieter and less egregious in their thuggery, but it’ll still continue.

I have to say that the rightwing pundits are running on fumes right now, though. They’re using their tired old lines about how everyone in Mnnieapolis is a paid agitator. They cite the well-written signs and how organized everyone was.

I mean, yes and yes? The former is just sad. They’re shocked at how literate Minnesotans are! As for the latter, well, we’ve had a lot of practice. After the George Floyd murder at the beginning of the pandemic, Minneapolis people organized hard. And they kept it up because there were other issues in South Minneapolis.

Chris Hayes pointed out that as a parent, he had several text groups for various parent groups that had texts such as, “Who’s bringing the snacks?” He implied they had to be highly effecient and organized in orderr for them to get shit done. He made the connection that it would be easy to use a  group such as that to organize protesters.

If there’s one thing Minnesotans can do well, it’s organize. We can do a potluck like no one else’s business. Also, we’re used to our winters. We arre not deterred by the blistering cold, snow, or actual ice. We know how to deal with all that whereas people coming in with no training do not.

I’ve talked in previous posts about how Minnesotans are made of stern stuff and how this federal administrration underestimated their enemy (and I do not use that last word lightly).

I firmly believe that Trump is laying siege to cities that voted against him. He’s even mentioned it several times that he ‘won’ Minnesota three times (he lost all three times he ran0. Whether or not he truly believes that he won Mninnesota, it doesn’t matter. It he does, then he thinks he’s takking back what is truly his. If he dosen’t (and to be clear, I leaned this way), then he’s getting revenged. In the case of Minnesota, there’s the added injustice (in his mind) that our governor was the Democratic candidate for VP. And is pretty outspoken on the issues with the Trump presidency.

As with many things about this president, it comes down to petty revenge. If you’re not 100% for him, then you’re against him. If you’re against him, then he’s going to try to take you out.

I want to reiterate that I kknew he was going to be awful this time around because he had nothing to lose, because he had a revenge list and was determined to go through it, and because he was not restrrained by normal human morality.


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We won’t back down

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Here is my post from yesterday about why I’m feeling the barest glimmer of hope. I am experiencing a deep sense of schadenfreude (again) because Greg Bovino, the duster coat wearing, swaggering macho asshole with a Napolean complex and a filthy mouth (filthy as in nasty to humans not like him, not filthy as in swear words), the man who had relentlessly mocked others as he pumped himself up is on his way on.

That’s not the reason I’m snickering to myself, though. I have included a video below of Chris Hayes from MS NOW who is here. He included a snippet of Trump saying (timestapmp 2:50):

You know, Bovino’s very good, but he’s, uh, a pretty out there kind of a guy, and in some cases that’s good maybe it wasn’t good here, and, uh, that’s all working out….

Hahahhahahhah! Hey, Bovino. how do you like the view from under the bus?

For all his scrapping and bowing, for all his muscling and bravado, for all that he’s become the face of Border Patrol (and to a lesser extent, ICE, because people blend the two together. For example, Alex Pretti was murdered by Border Patrol, but everyone says he was murderd by ICE.Personally, it’s a diference without distinction, and if people want to think it’s ICE, I have no qualms with that), for all that he’s relished swinging his dick around, it’s gotta hurt how quickly and easily he got thrown in the trash like yesterday’s garbage.

I know that this isn’t the end of anything, by far. but I’m allowed my moment of pure happiness that Bovino has been humiliated in this fashion. Yes, he was allowed to ‘retire’ (read,  demoted/fired), but he knows as we all know that heh was fired. And it has to hurt. It has to sting his oversized ego. And I am relishing every fucking moment.

I am not the better person when I reach the end of my compassion, so it seems. I just can’t at this moment. Let me rephrase that. I have so much compassion for my fellow Minnesotans, especially people in Minneapolis. I have compassion for others who are suffering. But for this administration or their former supporters? Hell, nah. I just can’t do it. And I’m fine with it.

I have to admit that Iw as wrong about something–kind of . As per usual, it’s not that simple because ideas are complicated. But, here goes. I was mostly wrong to be frustrated with the peaceful protests. I’m going to get into that along with my many caveats.

The peaceful protests are a powerful thing because they contrast the unhinged response from those on the right, ranging from the federal officers to the rest of the federal administration to the pundits to the MAGA supporters. They want to call Minnesotan protestors hateful and angry, and they haven’t been able to do it.


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A small sliver of hope

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Throughout this horror shitshow, I have had been almost overwhelmed by anger, depression, futility, fear, and a whole host of other negative feelings.

Once again, before I get into it, I have to give thanks that people are videotaping what is happening on the daily because it’s so much easier to refute the lies coming out of this federal administration on a regular basis.

Because of this, Gregory Bovino, is being pulled out of Minnesota. Rumors are that he’s being demoted or ‘allowed’ to retired (read, forced to retire). If this happens, I will be dancing in the streets because rightly or wrongly (probbaly wrongly), he has become the focus of my ire. Why? Because he’s here. He’s actively hurting my state. Like, physically. Because he dresses like he’s part of SEAL or some elite military squad like that.

He so desperately wants to be John Wayne, it’s pathetic. Also, I did not realize/remember that border ppatrol and ICE are not actually law enforcement. They want people to think they are, but they are not. Despite what the leaked memo says, they don’t have the legal right to go into the home of a legal citizen without a federal warrant. That’s not going to stop them, but I needed to remember that, for my own sanity.

He lies without hesitation and without remorse. He did it so relentlessly to a judge, she said that she could not take anything he said as truth (paraphrasing). I’ll post a video below of Jana Shortal, a local news anchor (and my local crush) and a colleague talking about this very topic. I have to give reporters credit for trying to hold his feet to the fire, but he just blusters, gets angry, talks over them, or the interview gets cut short.

I hope he steps on a Lego ever three to seven minutes at varying intervasls. I hope he never finds the cool part of his pillow as he tries to sleep. I hope his pants are always just a bit too tight and I hope that he never sleeps well again. Also, if he’s ‘allowed’ to retire, I hope that his every minute in of retirement is empty and painful.

As for Noem, the call for her impeachment grows louder. 140 signatures so far, and it’s only growing. There are also calls to remove Stephen Miller. Let’s throw the whole lot out and try again. Can we have a do-over on the 2024 election?


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I’m just so tired

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I found the video that I mentioned in yesterday’s post–the one in which Rachel Maddow gave me a sliver of hope that we might be turning the corner. I’ll post it down below. Added note: The video has been taken down and the account that posted it terminated. So it was probably uploaded illegally. I don’nt think it was political, though; just a DMCA strike. Instead, here is another Rachel Maddow video. Just because.

As I told my K, though, it’s going to get way worse before it gets better. But, it does seem like the Democrats are finally putting their foot down. And a few Republicans are at least making quiet noises of discomfort.

But, my god. The boldfaced lying continues to astound me. I mean, it shouldn’t. That’s their M.O. Lie, deflect, and attack. But, as Rachel (gah, I have the hugest political crush on her) said in the video, when people can see that you are lying, it’s much harder to pull the wool over their eyes. And, again, yeah, the dedicated base will eat whatever Trump vomits up in their mouths without question. And they will ask for more. They’re beyond reach. forget about them. But again, there’s that vast swathe of the middle people who can be won over.

By the way, I have two things I must say.

The first is that while I personally am very uneasy about the proliferation of guns in America, we have an agreement that people are allowed to conceal and carry if they have a license. Alex Pretti had a license and was lawfully carrying his gun. The feds are claiming that he pulled his gun and that’s why they fired at him. But video has shown that 1. a federal agent took a gun, probably from him, and then walk away. 2. His hands were up. He had his cell in one to recorrd them and nothing in the other. 3. His last words were apparently to the woman he was trying to help up. It was shared that he shouted, “Don’t touch her!” and then asked , “Are you ok?” to the woman.

My point is that my personal feelings about guns aside, one of the biggest golden calves for the far right is the 2nd Amendment. Now, however, they (and the feds) are trying to spin it so that Alex Pretti carrying a gun was the impetus for a federal agent killing him.

Oh, hell no. Hell to the fuck no. They are the ones who worship at the feet of the god of guns, so fuck that noise .I mean, we all knew it was only for them because that’s how they treat everything, but it’s interesting how quickly the second amendment righters turn on a  dime when it suits them.

The second is the repeated emphasis on how both Rachel Macklin Good and Alex Pretti were natural-born American citizens.I know whey they are doing it (politicians and journalists, I mean), but it doesn’t make me feel good. Like, would it have been ok if they were immigrants? I know that’s not what anyone means by it, but that’s what it sounds like to me.


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Rise up; stand up; don’t back down

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I woke up to the news that there’s been another local shooting by ICE. Oh wait. It might not be ICE. It might be Border Patrol. At any rate, it’s federal assholes. This time, it was K messaging me. which meant I had to be angry, upset, depressed, enraged, heartbroken, and a whole mess of other complicated emotions upon waking. Once again, I’ve spent all day in a daze, avoiding the video and the pictures, but reading what happened to the young man. I’m numb, yes, but there’s a rage burning in my heart, and it’s only growing stronger. There was a sliver of hope after the peaceful economic blackout yesterday–and now? We’re back in the terribleness we were in two weeks ago.

Before I continue on my rant, I want to say yet again that while I’m not happy with the increase of filming in public in general, I’m beyond grateful that it’s a staple in all the protests. Because without the video footage from ordinary people, ICE, DHS, and all the other presidential shills would be able to spin the narrative much more readily. Lord knows they’re doing their best to do it, anyway, but with all the video footage of what actually happened, it’s a much harder task for them.

Oh, I know MAGA will believe whatever their dear leader tells them, no matter what he says. Even when he changes his mind two minutes later, they agree unthinkingly.

Side note to the side note: This is a drum I’ve been banging for decades to the Democrats. Fuck that group. No, serious. Fuck them. Write them off. You will never ever ever win them over. I’m talking about that thirty percent of the population (roughly twenty percent, that’s an ass number, of the voters) who are just gonna be the way they are.

Stop ppandering to them. Stop trying to lure them to the dark side. Just. Fucking. Let. Them. Go. The ones you want to try to win over are the moderates and the independents. Oh, and by the way, you’re losing me as well because I’m tired of being put dead last every year. And not even consciously–but just by omission. That’s more insulting than being deliberately ignored.

Here’s the thing. The Democrats are shitty at messaging. And, for decades, they’ve tried to define themselves as the ‘not-Republicans’. The Dems were always reacting and never being proactive. They’re too nerdy and wonky for the gen pop. one of the big reasons Obama won was beacuse he had a simple message that connected with a vast swathe of people. He saved his wonkiness for when he got elected, which was a smart move. Oh, and he mobilized the online youth like none other. He internet savvy, and he used that to his advantage.

Back to my post.


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Sometimes, it snows in January

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There is a cold snap making its way across the Midwest. We are currently at -22F, ‘feels like’ -34F. I had stuck out one hand to see if it was really that cold–it was. Some time ago, I don’t know when, they changed the way they measured windchill to be more accurate. That means we’ll never have a windchill of -100 again. We had that when I was a kid, by the way. And, yes, they closed school for it.

I’m someone who loves the cold. L-O-V-E-S it. WHen I was younger, I used to play the (to me) fun game of seeing how far I could go into winter without closing my car windows. I could make it until it dipped below zero, and then I would roll up the windows.

Even then, I would keep the heat off. This was part two of the game–how long would it take for me to begrudgingly turn on the heat. Usually, it was around ten below, and then the game was over fror the year.

I use to have the thermometer in my house set at 62 during the day and 60 at night. As I said, I like it cold. Here’s a weird thing, though. The older I get, the less cold I’m able to tolerate.  It’s not a huge difference, but it’s there. I think it’s partly menopause, honestly. They talk about heat flashes, but I was getting cold flashes instead. It was interesting to get the cold shakes; it was almost an out-of-body experience.

Back to today. It’s cold. It’s really cold. It’s “stay the fuck in the house” cold. It would have been cold for me before I hit menopause, and it’s still cold now. I’m ready to hunker down the whole weekend and not step a foot outside.

Here’s the weird thing. The last four or five winters (the ones since my medical crisis)have been all over the place. More snow in general (save one year), not as cold, and just all over the map. Probably because of climate change, sadly. I love the more snow personally, but I don’t like what it says about our weather patterns. Also, I’m aware that other people don’t like snow and/or cold as much as I do, so I feel bad for them. I don’t have to drive in it, either, which helps.

I bring it up because one of the things that makes me happy is watching the ICE fall  on ice. I have included a SNL skit that has a St. Paul-born comedian ragging on ICE falling on ice. It’s easy to tell that they are not Minnesotans because they are not prepared for Minnesota winters. Wactching them flail their arms as they vainly attempt to stay upright has given me much joy.


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Sometimes, to make an omelet, you have to kick some fucking ass

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The surrealness of the world around me continues. On many levels, yes, but, sefishly, it’s what’s happening in MN that is occupying most of my mind. Don’t get me wrong. I’m outraged about Venezuela. I’m livid about Greenland. I’m seething over the tariffs and other economic bullshit that is emanating from this administration. But it’s what happening in Minneapolis that is most pressing in my mind because it’s nearest (literally and figuratively) to me.

Even then, I’m careful about how much news I ingest every day. I used to write for a political blogh, so I would watch/read a large amount of news a day. Iwas on the abortion beat, so most of the news I read was infuriating, sad, or depressing. I had to make sure I wasn’t burning myself out, and I did that for a few years.

Once Obama was out of office, I was no longer writing for the political blog. I also wasn’t watching/reading as much news as before. I had reached my limit, and I did not want to steep myself in that world again.

I kept up with the news, of course. I made sure I knew the big stuff. I cursorily skimmed the news, and then I kept it moving.

It’s too easy to doomscroll for hours. There is so much bad news, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, helpless, and despaired. In fact, I feel that way much of the time now. I know that’s what this administration wants, but it’s hard not to remain hopeful. There have been sliver of good news, but so few and far between.

Here’s yesterday’s post. I’m not even going to try to tie it in with this post. Why? Because I’m tired, and I just can’t be bothered. There is a connection, at least in my mind, and I’m going to leave it at that.

I’m still exhausted because of the shots (Covid and flu), but it’s not nearly as bad as it was when I got the three shots on one day. It’s on par with what I normally feel after a shot. Slightly worse, but nothing too noticeable.

I’ve been very careful with not overdoing it as I get better. One good thing about Taiji and Bagua  is that it’s not something that you’re going to lose much if you can’t do it for a day or two. Or even a month. Yes, I forgot a few postures in my month off, but I was able to teach it to myself fairly quickly again.

One of the most amazing things about my medical crisis is how I was able to pick up my practice about a week after I got out of the hospital, shaky and tired, yes, but still able to do most of it. Taiji is chill and relaxed. It’s not the same as Bagua, but I did not start practicing that until well after my medical crisis was over.


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Taking the high road when others aren’t

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Life is still rough here in Minnesota. Very rough. So very fucking rough. The Federal DOJ opened an investigation into Gov. Walz and Mayor Frey for exceedingly bogus reasons. I’m not going to name them because my god. It doesrn’t matter at this point. None of this matters at any point. I included the video of the charges below if you want to see them with your own eyes/hear them with your own ears. One tiny bit of good news is that it was ruled by a federal judge that Minnesotans can follow ICE as long as it was from a safe distance away (ICE/feds claimed this was not allowed), but it just doesn’t seem enough.

Nothing is enough, obviously. Jen Psaki, the host of the video I included below (and warning for rough viewing, by the way), made it clear that the investigation is bullshit. She cites the numbers, and, yes, they are horrible for this persident. Some are the lowest they’ve ever been–ever!–, but they’re still at anywhere from 30% to 41%. That’s still way too many people who think everything is just hunky-dory.

This is actually part of the bigger problem–which is my fellow Americans. That’s not what this post is about, though–you know what? I ‘m going to make it about that because I can. And because it fits with the theme (sort of). The theme being taking the high or low road. I wrote at length about this fallacy (taking the high road is always a  good thing, solely on an idealogical level) in a prior post.

Quick primer: For most of my life as a Democrat, I’d watch the Democrats bleat about taking the high road. They gave in over and over again, and it was always frustrating. Why was it only the Dems who were expected to negotiate and meet in the middle? I mentioned in a prior post that I’m at the end of my rope with being compassionate and peaceful.e

Every time the Republicans won a major election, it was spun as them having the will of the people to do what they wanted. When a Democrat won, however, it was spun as the country being fractured, and the Dems had to work extra hard to make sure the Republican Americans did not feel shunned/rebuffed/out in the cold.

Many Dems felt that way, too. Or at least they mouthed the words that sounded like they agreed. Whereas the Republicans blithely ignored any semblance of extending the olive branch. Thirty yaers, I’ve listened to this. It’s always been a case of being on different teams, but there were lines that neither side would cross.

Those lines are completely erased now. As I’ve said, my friends and I have agreed that we’re not exactly surprised by what this president has done, but the surprise is how quickly and violently it’s happened. Also, in my case, it’s how efficiently it’s happening. Which makes me suspect that it’s not him.


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Checking in on *waves hand in every direction*

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I feel like shit. Physically, mentall, and emotionally. The first is easiest to explain. I got my Covid booster and my flu shot yesterday. I react very badly to shots. I knew better than to get both at the same time, but that was warring with the part of me that really resists doing anything at all. The latter is the thing that makes me overdo it when I actually muster up the energy to do anything.

My flu arm is just a bit puffy and not tender at all. The left arm is tender, sore, and puffy. It hurts if I even just brush against it, and it hurts if I lift it over above shoulder level. Plus, I’m just exhausted. More so than in general. I knew to expect this because this always happens when I get vaxes, but it does not make it easier knowing it’s going to happen beforehand.

I went light on my weapons today. I was able to do my warmups, the Taiji Solo Form, and the Bagua Swimming Dragon Form. I think I did the Double Fan Form? Maybe? Not the other ones, though. I also did the part of the Bagua Knife Form I know. I think. It’s hard to say beacuse i do a lot of the same things every day, so it blends together.

I know this is better than getting the flu or Covid, but it’s still sucky. I think this is something that people have a hard time understanding. Something can be both bad and good at the same time. These days especially, Americans really are binary. Not just when it comes to gender, but about so many things.

We especially like to label someone good and the other person bad. There has to be a villian and a hero, and we have to be team one person or the other. Nuance, never one of our strong suits, has gotten even worse in the past decade or so.

Anyway, I did not get the flu shot for many years, but after my medical crisis, I decided it’s not time to mess around. That’s why I got my pneumonia vax, too. My immune system is a mess, and I need to be really careful about what I do to it. And I’ve been faithfully getting my Covid boosters every six months (more or less). I don’t go out much, and I still wear a mask. I’ve always had a shitty immune system, and it’s only gotten worse since my medical crisis.

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