Tag: comfort zone | A Banana Peeled

Daring to be different

Posted on October 24, 2023 by Minna Hong • 0 Comments

I am bananapants.

I have decided to do something completely different for NaNoWriMo. I was going to do my medical memoir, and I still want to do that at some point. But I have decided that I want to do something else for NaNoWriMo. What is it, you ask? I don’t want to say right now. I don’t like to talk about my writing before I do it because it loses something as I talk about it. Also, if I talk about it, then I don’t have as much energy to do it.

Side note: This is what complaining about a problem does if you complain enlessly about it. I am someone who likes a good vent. My spleen, it needs emptying sometimes. I believe it’s not good to keep it in because it can cause tension and stress.

However. If you find yourself complaining about the same thing all the time, that’s a problem. In part because if you complain about it, you think you’re doing something about it. Your brain says, “Yup, you’re done with this” when you haven’t actually done anything. And it gets grooved in such a way that the more you complain about it, the more you think you’ve done something. I know this because this is my mother. But this post is not about that.

I usually write myysteries. I started writing them because I enjoy reading them, but there were none that reflected me. This was way back in the day when there were very few female protags, let alone the hodgepodge that is me. The few female Asian protags were, very VERY thin on the ground. And one of them was so cringe-worthy. The whole tiger mama trope, ugh, I don’t want to even think about it.

Is it self-certered? Yes. I wanted to read books that reflected my life anwd my experiences. I think most people want that, don’t they? I mean, male gamers throw major tantrums when there are people who are not them in games, let alone the main character. It’s a travesty to them. A TRAVESTY I say! But in their world, it’s normal rather than being self-centered. Because the whole Western world is made for white cis het dudes. That’s just the way it is. So I feel no compunction about doing the same for myself.

I like who I am. It’s taken half a century to reach that point–plus dying twice, but I’m there. I am circumspect about that because it’s just not done, but I like my total package. I’m not saying I don’t have flaws. I do. I’mw not saying I can’t improve. I most definitely can. But I’m saying that the basic components that make up me, I’m down with all that.

Back to what I want to write for NaNoWriMo.

Opting in vs. opting out

Posted on October 1, 2023 by Minna Hong • 0 Comments

In my life, I’m a very private person, edging towards secretive. I am where secrets go to die, and people know they can tell me things. I will talk about things with Kathleen, but she is also a steel trap. And Ian. Another steel trap. Other than that, though, I won’t talk about something someone tells me without their specific consent.

I am always an opt-in person. I hate websites that make me opt-out. I was just on one that has gotten worse and worse every year. And it maks you opt-out of getting emails and other bullshit. I know why websites do that, obviously. It’s inertia. They know that it’s easier for people to mindlessly click through than to unclick the checked boxes. That’s Marketing 101–and it’s Psychology 101 as well. Make it as hard as possible for people to opt-out. Or more effort, I should say.

In real life, I liken it to people who are an open book. You can ask them anything, and they’ll tell you what you want to know. Guileless is the word. I have no issue with that as long as it’s limited to their own shit. But, this is the problem with people like that–they are often open with your shit as well. I have had this problem with a close friend in that anything you tell her is going to be told to other people unless you specifically say it’s a secret.

In addition, she likes to be in on all conversations (as we all do, but she does to a bigger extent), so she’l throw something into the conversation even if it’s not hers to be throw in. She does it without thinking, and I’ve had to have a chat or two with her about it. I’ve also realized that I have to be careful what I tell her. If I tell her it’s private, she will keep it to herself, but I have to specifically tell her.

It took me longer than it should have for me to realize that because if someone tells me something, I keep it to myself unless they say it’s OK to share. It’s not my news so why would I tell someone else about it? It’s interesting to me to see the wide gulf between the two. I mean, there are gradients, obviously, but my friend and I are on the far ends of the spectrum.

I know that my nature is in part becuase my father is very secretive himself–maladaptively so. I have said this a million times, but one example has stuck in my mind all my life. It was when I was a teenager. A friend of my parents (a woman) called and asked for my father. I said that he was playing tennis with another friend. When my parents came back, I told my father about the phone call. He freaked out and yelled at me for telling the friend thta he was playing tennis with another (female, very attractive) friend.

I had no idea why he was so upset. If you think about it dispassionately, it was not a big deal. He and my mother were playing tennis with a friend. Another friend wanted to talk to him. I told the second friend he was out with the first. Nothing underhanded there, right?

Exploring Dirtmouth With My Trusty Rusty Nail

Posted on April 10, 2017 by Minna Hong • 1 Comment

i am your savior? — The things I’ve seen.

Ed. Note: I am talking about the game, Hollow Knight, in this post. There will be spoilers, but no boss names. Be forewarned.

As I wander through Dirtmouth, tattered cape flapping in the wind, and my nail strapped to my back, I marvel at the lush but bleak environments surrounding me. I don’t say a word as I jump about, hitting bugs with my nail as I do. When I hit them, I get more bug juice to fill my orb, which is the stuff life is made of, and it’s also what later fuels my spells. Hey, I’m a caster at heart, so anything that shoots from a distance and takes mana to use it is magic, even if it’s not called that in the game itself. Game? Did I not mention I was playing Hollow Knight, the game I bought for myself as my birthday present? I wrote in a prior post that I was considering three games for my birthday and that this is the one that least fits what I prefer to play. To put it bluntly, I don’t like platformers. I’m old with slower reflexes and bad eyesight. Platformers are about finesse and precision and quick reactions. It’s an understatement to say that we don’t get along. However, Hollow Knight caught my eye while it was in development because of the graphics and because it’s a Souls-inspired game. I put it on my wishlist and forgot about it, until I was thinking of what game I wanted to buy myself for my birthday.

Side note: One of the reasons I might have a bad impression of me and platformers is because the ones I’ve tried are notorious for their difficulty. Let me hasten to add that despite my affinity for Souls games, I’m not the type to get all macho and seek out the hardest games to conquer. That’s not my jam at all, and the first hardcore game I played and loved was Torchlight, which has a special place in my heart. I still have it installed on my computer, and I will probably never uninstall it, even though I could use the space. Anyway, I mention it as a way to show that I’m not a games snob, only seeking out the hardest games to play. That being said, the games I’ve been drawn to and obsessed over have been more difficult than not. Cook, Serve, Delicious is a surprisingly hard cooking sim, and I played it until I 100%’ed it. I cannot WAIT for the sequel, btw. It should be coming out later this year.

Another game I obsessed over, surprisingly so, was Nuclear Throne–a colorful, charming rogue-like game in which there are several different characters you can take through the wasteland dungeons. Each has a different ability, such as Fish can roll. Crystal (the most player-friendly player) hulks out into a bigger crystal during which she is invulnerable. Perhaps my favorite character is Robot, who can munch weapons for health or ammo. It’s interesting to have different skills like this for the characters because after playing one character, such as Crystal, I found myself needlessly munching weapons as Robot, thinking I’d be hulking out. I stopped playing once I realized that I had hit a hard wall and would never be able to access the newest content because it was for looping the game, which was something I rarely could do. I have no hard feelings, but I realized it just wasn’t for me any longer.

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