In yesterday’s post, I talked about not wanting children. It bothers me that in the year of our endemic, 2023, it’s still considered the norm to have children. Or rather, that people perceived as women are still pushed to have them. I had naively thought that in the thirty years that have passed since I… Continue Reading
When I was little, I had no dreams for the future. Mostly because I didn’t think I had one, nor did I really want to live. I just made my way through each day, hanging on until the end. Oh, wait. I had one dream. That was to be an actor. I loved to perform… Continue Reading
In wtaching the Outside Xbox/Xtra crew doing their hypemeter reaction to GeoffCon, I was cracking up because Mike was the grumpy old man of the group. That’s how he always is during these kind of events. One year, he was saying, “Enough anime bullshit!” which made everyone laugh, but was actually kind of rude. This… Continue Reading
If I could have given my younger self some advice, it would be fuck the police. Er, fuck everyone olse. I can’t emphasize to her how little everyone eles’s opinion matter. Sure, you want to be kind and thoughtful. And, yes, you want to have good friends and connect with individuals, but those assholes who… Continue Reading
When I was a kid, I was taught that there was nothing about the family that you could say to anyone not in the family. I’m not talking about big things like marital difficulties (though, that, of course, was also verboten), but about the little things. The story I tell over and over goes like… Continue Reading
I have a confession to make. I’m the ‘well, actually’ person whom everyone hates. I know better than to say it out loud…most of the time. But I think it often. Whether it’s something factual that someone else has gotten wrong or a thought that was, well, not well thought out–I have a voice in… Continue Reading
Thinking more about the fat thing (ha, I wrote phat first, which is funny) because it’s irking me. I watched a few minutes of a Dr. Mike video in which he talked about BMI. He was careful to say that it’s just a tool and that blah, blah, blah, but then he defended it as… Continue Reading
Back in my twenties, there was a big discussion in the community* about emphasizing that sexual orientation was not a choice. “After all,” they said. “Straight people don’t choose to be straight.” which, true. But. And this is where my brain gets weird. I’m bisexual, for lack of a better word. Which in theory means… Continue Reading
I love myself. I had to start with that because it’s a revolutionary statement for me. I have spent most of my life hating myself. I was told both explicitly and implicitly that I was… just…wrong. This was suburban MN in the seventies. I was fat, Asian, brainy, and probably neurodivergent. I did not watch… Continue Reading
In yesterday’s post, I talked about things that unwittingly push my buttons. Or rather, wittingly, but seemingly randomly. I know what it is, though. It’s me being understanding all over the place and not getting it in return. With every subject, I am in the invisible/ignored category. With race, it’s because I’m Asian. With sexuality,… Continue Reading